Two Men Are Accused Of Breaking Into Lance Armstrong Storage Unit And Stealing $100K Worth Of Extremely Expensive Bikes

Two men are accused of breaking into a storage unit owned by cyclist/cheater Lance Armstrong and stealing a reported half dozen bikes valued at more than $100,000.

According to KXAN, Armstrong's storage unit was broken into sometime between December 10 and 12. The two fellas accused of the burglary — Shaun Thompson, 36, and Ethan Harms, 33 — made off with six bikes collectively valued at $105,800, per the police affidavit.

Unfortunately for them, four of the six had markings that made it very clear they belonged to Lance Armstong.

Real smart. Maybe don't steal bicycles from the one pro cyclist everyone knows. One look at those hot two-wheelers and anyone over the age of 20 will go, "Wait... did you steal these from Lance Armstong?"

The two men are facing third-degree felonies because what they stole was valued at between $30,000 and $150,000. They're also believed to have broken into other storage units over the years.

Lance Armstrong rides a bike that could very well be worth more than my 2022 Kia Forte. (Photo by Ezra Shaw/Getty Images)

Bikes Are Very Expensive For Some Reason And I'm Not Just Talking About Lance Armstrong's Very Nice Bikes

The most amazing thing to me about this entire story is that 6 bicycles could add up to $105,800. I know these are some damn fine racin' bikes, but still, I can't help but feel like bikes have gotten pricey.

I wandered into a bike shop just to have a look around the other day. My jaw almost hit the floor when I saw the prices. They were going for thousands.

They were thousands of dollars for bikes that nobodies like me would ride. Not bikes that somebodies (who cheated but are still somebodies) like Lance Armstrong ride.

These weren't the kind of bikes you'd use to cruise with the peloton or climb the Alps. These were the kind that you ride to the grocery store to save on gas. At most, you do a wheelie to impress the *Jerry Lewis voice* laaaaaaadieeeees!

Maybe I was in the wrong place to buy a normal person bike, but Lance Armstrong getting burgled made me think that there may just be a lot of money in bicycles.

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