Tiger Woods Has Given Up Sex Ahead Of The Masters

The countdown to the 2024 Masters is ON, and that means no sex for Tiger Woods. 

That's right. No sex. None. Nada. Zero. The Big CAT is locked in for his return to Augusta National next week, and he's not taking any chances with his opening tee shot just over a week away. 

Bottom line, at least according to a close pal – he's keeping the tiger in the cage (come on, that's funny!) until he's done destroying the rest of the field sometime next Sunday. 

Tiger Woods isn't about to let a little sex get in the way of another Masters win

"He’s focused," says a friend of the 48-year-old golfer. "He’s working really hard in the gym. He’s eating right. He’s even eliminated sex.

"He does that now when he’s preparing: no sex until the tournament is over. He doesn’t want anything to take away his focus."

Look out, Masters field. Eldrick is BACK, and he's more determined than ever to win another green jacket. 

Keep your distance, ladies, play time is over. It's Masters week, and Tiger Woods is showing up to Augusta with balls bluer than the Georgia sky. 

Give me the Big Cat by a BILLION next week. Do the rest of the fellas even bother showing up after hearing this? You think Scottie Scheffler has what it takes to beat a horny Tiger Woods? Don't think so. No shot. 

If you thought Tiger was on edge before, you ain't seen nothin' yet. Our man loves sex. Duh. I'm not breaking any news to anyone there. Nothing wrong with that, either, until it gets you smacked over the head with a 9-iron. 

But Tiger isn't taking that chance this week. He's been put back together for the 100th time, and he's not about to ruin it with a pre-Masters quickie. Not worth it. 

Knocking boots can wait. It's Masters week. Pants on, eyes on the prize. 

Let's go get us a green jacket.