Threats Fly At NASCAR All-Star Race, Bubba Wallace's Embarrassing Day, Logano Cries & Racer's Racy SI Debut

Yeah, I mean – let's just go ahead and make North Wilkesboro an actual, points-paying NASCAR race, and move on with our lives. Right?

It's been a pretty rough stretch lately for the series, if we're being frank. And we are nothing if not frank around here. 

Hell, I'm not sure that we've really had a great race in a few months now. Sunday night felt like a step in the right direction. Sure, Joey Logano led a billion laps, but there was always action. Always something going on. Always a battle for one of the top spots. 

The leaders never really pulled away from each other. Guys were beating and banging lap after lap. And for all 14 of you Christopher Bell fans out there, we even had an exciting finish!

Fine. That was too far. I'm sorry. I meant to say 12! 

It's a joke! Everyone loves Christopher. 

Anyway, I appreciate short-track racing like that. This stupid Next-Gen car has ruined most short tracks – hello, Martinsville! – but last night was fun. At least for me. And I'm all that matters. Let's talk about it!

What else? I've got tempers rising all weekend long, a couple of threats tossed out there, Bubba Wallace losing to a bunch of JV drivers, the series shifting from Fox to Amazon Prime and the wildest wreck you'll ever see. 

Oh yeah! I've also got #swimsuitcontent! Can't beat that, am I right?

Four tires, some of that Sunoco racin' fuel, and maybe a peace-beer for Zane Smith and Noah Gragson … Monday Morning Pit-Stop – the ‘I’m Gonna Beat His Ass!' edition – is LIVE!

Everyone was angry this weekend!

It may have been All-Star weekend, but, unlike the insufferable NBA, NASCAR actually attempts to put on a good show. 

And I'll give ‘em credit … I thought they did a decent job. North Wilkesboro is awesome. Again, I’m all for making it a real race next season, and moving the All-Star race somewhere else. A lot of the drivers seem to be advocating for a move back to Charlotte? Eh. That's boring. I'm not sure NASCAR does that. 

Is there a reason Rockingham can't get the All-Star race next season? I'm just spit-balling, but you see where I'm coming from. 

Anyway, the product on the track was solid all weekend, which we haven't been able to say for a while now. And, when the product is good on the track, it's bound to be good off of it, too. 

And that's what really matters to us, of course. 

Is Joey Logano serious with this crap?

That last one from the younger fellas is legitimately one of the calmest "f--k yous' I've ever seen on camera. And that means, obviously, that Corey Heim might be a serial killer. The quiet white dudes? Those are the guys to watch. And I'm white, so I can say that!

Anyway, Ty Dillon wasn't as reserved, which makes sense given his lineage. I've also seen Zane Smith (and his wife, McCall!), and I can promise you that fight would last about four seconds. Zane doesn't want any part of that. 

Now, speaking of fights … let's check in with Joey Logano, who led a billion laps, but ultimately lost to Christopher Bell after a solid final 20 laps of racing. 

And by ‘solid,’ I mean Christopher wrecked him, spun him, spit on him, and then yanked Joey out of the window and started beating the ever-loving shit out of him. 

At least, that's how Joey makes it sound:

Bubba, Dale, Amazon & what a mess!

God bless. Is Joey serious here? I don't even have a horse in this race, and I can tell you he's full of shit. Even Joey Logano fans have to be embarrassed by that. 

They were literally door-racing all night long. Every single lap, someone was running someone up the track trying to get a position. That's the sort of racing North Wilkesboro lends itself to. 

Bristol has the Bump ‘n Run. North Wilkesboro has the Door n’ Floor. And hey! I just made that up all by myself. Quick, someone make me rich!

Joey's also the king of BS moves on the track. That's sort of his thing. Don't sit here and bullshit a bullshitter, Joey. This one ain't passing the smell test. 

Oh no! I can't believe he ran me up the track and used me to make the pass with 10 laps to go and a million dollars on the line … especially after I just spent the last 20 laps blocking the shit out of him!

Get outta here! Of course that's how he passed you, Joe! Duh. Is this your first short-track race? God. 

OK, let's move on before the Logano truthers flood my inbox. Speaking of …

Zach.Dean@OutKick.com if you wanna join the show!

OK, couple quick-hitters on the way to Charlotte. 

Bubba Wallace, amazingly, didn't even qualify for the All-Star race, which is impressive in itself:

I don't wanna shit on Bubba today (too much), but that's a tough look. There's really no excuse for a car owned by Denny Hamlin and Michael Jordan – and propped up in JGR equipment – not to beat out a bunch of JV drivers in The Open. None. 

I'm also surprised Bubba didn't win the fan vote. He's usually cheered wherever he goes! 

Next? I know I've been heaping praise on North Wilkesboro all morning, but don't just take my word for it!

My guess? Probably next season. NASCAR loves a good promotion, and Dale Jr. returning to race a primetime Xfinity event at North Wilkesboro? Yeah, I can hear the fellas in marketing barking like dogs from here. Bank on it. 

Speaking of JuneBug … he's BACK! We hit on it last week – and I'll have more on it later this week – but NASCAR broadcasts officially shift from Fox to Amazon Prime for the next five races. 

That means we get Junior back in the booth for the first time in two years, and a bunch of pissed-off race fans boycotting the sport because they ‘can’t find the damn channel!'

Just ask Chip R!

Hey Zach, 

I think you are vastly underestimating how bad NASCAR will crash and burn Memorial Day Sunday. It ain't just grandmas who can't find Amazon Prime that won't be there. I'm a 58-year-old engineer that helped Al Gore invent the internet back in the 90's.  

I love Memorial Day Sunday.  Wake up, fix an omelet and bloody mary for Monaco, slide right into the Indy 500 and wrap it up with the World 600. This year I'm ending after Indy.

I ain't paying $20 for Amazon for a month. I COULD do it, but I'm choosing not to. Steve Phelps has ruined NASCAR, and I'm hoping this fiasco drives him out.  

NASCAR was the greatest competitive event in the USA.  Show up, meet the inspection and be one of the 40 fastest cars there. No matter what race or sex, or even if you were transgender.  Show up with a legal fast car and you are in. That is what America is about.  

Not raking another $20 out of your fanbase for a month. I'm out.

Thanks, Chip R. What a rollercoaster. Love the passion. Love the intensity. Love the Memorial Day Sunday routine. Especially love calling it the World 600. Incredible. 

Now, to be fair, I'm quite sure it doesn't cost $20 for an Amazon Prime subscription. Lord, I hope it doesn't, because I have one. 

Google tells me that Prime video coast $9 a month. If you wait until Friday to buy it, that means you just have to pay for the one month and you'll get all five Amazon races. 

Wait until FRIDAY though. You do it before, and you'll have to renew your subscription before the final Amazon race at Pocono on June 22. 

You're welcome!

Finally, let's end this water-cooler talk on a strong note!

Take us to Charlotte, Toni!

Here's my absolute favorite part about that whole disaster. From Racing America:

Following this incident, the night at Lancaster Motorplex will come to an end.

Gee, ya think? Yeah, probably good to go ahead and call it a night after the entire field wrecks because it's raining and nobody can get any grip to make a hard left turn. 

Oh well. Maybe next time!

OK, that's it for today. Good class. Let's head to Charlotte with our heads held high, and truck series driver Toni Breidinger!

Mainly Toni, though: