Nobody Showed Up To Watch The Oakland A's Play Baseball On MLB Opening Day

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Baseball is BACK, baby! Can you feel it? Hey, I'm talking to you Oakland Athletics fans – can you FEEEEEEEL it?!

Anyone? Hello? Y'all got me? Hm. I swear yesterday was opening day around Major League Baseball … surely there was a game out in Oakland, right?

Yep. Just checked the ‘ol MLB app. There WAS a game. The fake Cleveland Indians won, 8-0. Not great. 

But hey, baseball is still baseball, and I’m sure the loyal fans out in Oakland still enjoyed what will probably (?) be their final opening day ever, right?

Right!?

Oakland A's crowd is pathetic 

It's just so, so, sooooo sad. Remember the Money Ball days? The days of Mark Mulder, and Miguel Tejada, and Jeremy Giambi – the best Giambi, by the way – and Barry Zito?

Gone. All gone. The A's are shipping out of Oakland whenever they finally build that massive ballpark in Las Vegas, and the fans have no interest in paying money to go watch a bunch of scrubs lose a billion games this year. 

And by the way, they will most certainly lose a billion games this year. The team STINKS. I tried to watch last night, and I legit couldn't name a single player on the roster. They made the fake Cleveland Indians look like world-beaters. Sad. 

Anyway, best part from last night? Turns out, most of the fans weren't even watching back at home. They were instead out in the parking lots boycotting those crooks inside the actual stadium. 

Hilarious:

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Zach grew up in Florida, lives in Florida, and will never leave Florida ... for obvious reasons. He's a reigning fantasy football league champion, knows everything there is to know about NASCAR, and once passed out (briefly!) during a lap around Daytona. He swears they were going 200 mph even though they clearly were not.