Nationals' Presidents Race Recreates Harry Potter Storyline, But Ignores Most Of The Real Plot In Process

J.K. Rowling is not a popular figure in pop culture, in large part because she wants to protect the definition of what it means to be a biological woman, and advocates for fairness in women’s sports.

Because we live in an upside-down world, this makes her an incredibly unpopular figure. However, her fictional series "Harry Potter" is still popular in the world at large, even among our nation’s presidents.

The presidents at the Washington Nationals ballpark, that is.

It was "Harry Potter Day" at Nationals Park, and fans were channeling their inner Potterhead as they made their way to watch the home team take on the Milwaukee Brewers.

But perhaps the funniest part of the whole day was that Thomas Jefferson and Teddy Roosevelt played a game of quidditch (again, the mascots, not the real dudes. But could you imagine how fun that would be in real life?).

Jefferson (or was that Draco Malfoy?) ended up winning the event. But winning is a loose term, since Roosevelt crashed into the outfield fence and the golden snitch ended up just running away.

Eventually, we learned that Roosevelt was actually Ron Weasley (what a legend), and right after face-planting into the wall, he turned around to find his best friend - Harry Potter - standing with wand in hand, ready to do battle.

Then, in the biggest plot twist ever, Ron killed his best friend just to win a foot race.

Now if I recall correctly (and I’m really good at remembering how things go in movies - just ask my family), that’s not how the series ended. Harry survived all seven movies and ended up killing Voldemort (excuse me, "The One Who Shall Not Be Named"), to save the world.

***checks the ever-reliable YouTube to confirm***

Boom! I was right again.

But at the Nationals stadium, things got weirder. Ron ended up having to confront either Voldemort (I can just hear all of you yelling "Don't say his name"), or Draco's dad, Lucius - it was hard to tell based on the costume. Either way, Ron lost the duel, and a certifiable a-hole would end up winning the race. 

That prompted the crowd to fiercely boo the outcome.

I don’t know if Rowling would approve of this creative license to her fictional masterpiece, but I’m sure she appreciates the love it got nonetheless.