NASCAR Fan Who Had Been Drinking Since 3 A.M. Ran Across Pocono Raceway And Nearly Died 31 Years Ago Today

Can't believe it's been 31 years since arguably the greatest 13 seconds in NASCAR history. 

And no, I ain't talking about an old Sterling Marlin pickup line! (If you get that one, you're a true OG NASCAR fan, and we need to get a beer here pretty soon). 

No, I'm talking about today – June 13 – being the 31-year anniversary of the legendary racin' fan who was 15 Coors Lights deep and high on caffeine pills, who ran across Pocono Raceway – during an actual race – only to disappear into the forest for hours until ultimately lighting a signal fire so police could find him. 

Wheeeew. What a sentence! 

This is why NASCAR used to be great

I mean, what a time to be alive, huh? When they say the 1990s were so much better, this is why. Right here. Now, I was only six months old when this 25-year-old legend risked it all in a pair of jorts, but I promise you this race was on in the Dean house. We never missed one, and never will. 

From something called The Morning Call, which I assume is/was a local paper in the Poconos, two days after the race:

A Lancaster County man drank beer and popped caffeine pills for 13 hours before darting across the track at the Pocono International Raceway Sunday afternoon midway through the Champion Spark Plug 500.

"I don’t remember. I don’t know why I did it," said Chad Blaine Kohl, 25, of Ephrata, after his arraignment on risking a catastrophe and related charges.

Kohl, who appeared on the verge of tears yesterday, would not elaborate, saying, "I’m embarrassed enough by this whole thing."

At about 4:15 p.m., Kohl came within blinks of being part of the super speedway’s 2-1/2-mile tri-oval.

Kohl, a computer programmer with no prior criminal record, is charged with arson, risking a catastrophe, criminal mischief, trespassing, disorderly conduct and public drunkenness.

Kohl told District Justice Dan Whitesell of Mountainhome, "I think I have a drinking problem. I think I need help."

Whitesell set bail at $20,000 and remanded Kohl to the Monroe County Jail. A preliminary hearing is scheduled for 9:30 a.m., June 24 before District Justice Clancy Dennis, Tobyhanna.

"I think you are a very lucky man to be sitting here right now," Whitesell told Kohl. "You could easily be dead."

Hey, judge – back off. No need to pile on. 

And, more importantly, no need to discourage this sort of behavior. This is what made/makes NASCAR great. There ain't another sport in the world where you can throw back a 24-pack of Coors, pop some caffeine pills like Jessie Spano from Saved by the Bell, and then run across the playing surface and risk your life, only to disappear into the woods. 

None. And that's why NASCAR is the best.  

PS: all-time statement here from Chad:

"I was at the races in the infield. I had been drinking Coors Light beer since 3 a.m. and took one No-Doz," Kohl wrote in a signed statement. "I ran across the track. I remember walking through the briers."

PPS: this wasn't the first time a drunk fan nearly died at Pocono!