King Of Conkers: Player In Legendary Nut-Smashing Tournament Underfire After Getting Caught With Nuts Of Steel

Just over one year ago, I wrote an article for this fine website about the sport of conkers.

It involves competitors trying to smash other players' chestnuts threaded onto strings with their own and it's popular in the United Kingdom (see what can happen when there's no Division I college football in your country?).

Last year's concern was that the nuts were too soggy, and I thought that would be the last time I ever wrote about conkers, though that was largely because I used my best nut jokes.

However, the world of conkers has pulled me back in, and this year it's for the opposite reason: one player is alleged to have nuts of steel.

According to the Associated Press, around 200 nut-busters showed up to take part in this year's edition of the World Conker Championship in the village of Southwick in central England.

One of those on hand was 82-year-old grizzled veteran of the game Dave Jakins who went on to show that age is just a number and won the men's side of the tournament.

However, on Tuesday it was announced that Jakins is under investigation after allegations were made that he was using a steel chestnut.

Say it ain't so, Dave Jakins…

King Conker David Jakins takes part in the annual World Conker Championships at the Shuckburgh Arms in Southwick, Peterborough. (Photo by Jacob King/PA Images via Getty Images)

King Conker Caught With Steel Nuts

According to The Telegraph, Jakins was the "King Conker" which means he was the head judge and was tasked with drilling and setting up the event's conkers. However, after defeating several opponents with a single hit — including Alastair Johnson-Ferguson in the men's final — Jakins was found to have a steel chestnut on him.

"My conker disintegrated in one hit, and that just doesn’t happen," Johnson-Ferguson said.

"Now it turns out King Conker had a dummy steel conker, so he could have swapped his real conker for that one. Or he could have marked the conker strings to pick out a harder nut.

Jakins insists that he had the steel conker simply for "humor value," and he ultimately lost the world title to 34-year-old Kelci Banschbach, the pride of Indianapolis, who became the first American to win the world championship.

 Hopefully, we get some answers sooner rather than later to maintain the integrity of conkers. 

At the rate that we cover conkers, we should have an update a year from now.