Joey Chestnut Caps Off Record-Setting Hot Dog Performance With Hall Of Fame Dude Wipes Ad

I don't know how you spent your Labor Day, but I spent mine watching competitive eating GOAT Joey Chestnut throw down a performance for the ages against fellow competitive eating legend Takeru Kobayashi.

I rolled into the Labor Day festivities at my mom's place and before I started dropping a performance of my own on the Weber, I commandeered the TV and made sure that all in attendance were witness to history as Chestnut downed a historic 83 hot dogs and buns.

After a summer of controversy, I saw this as one of the high watermarks of Chestnut's storied career.

But speaking of high water, Chestnut may have one-upped himself by dropping one of the best social media sponsored posts I've ever seen, centering on what happens the day after a feat of gluttony like he threw down on Labor Day.

Fittingly enough, it was a post sponsored by the manliest brand in the ass-wiping land, Dude Wipes.

Bravissimo! 

*Wipes (no pun intended) a tear and throws a bouquet from the upper balcony*

I normally skim right past an Instagram post if I see "paid promotion" a the top, but I think Dude Wipes may have changed that.

By the way, Dude Wipes have always made me laugh thanks to their very existence. As far as I know, they're exactly the same as any other brand of wipe. However, some absolute genius realized that fellas don't like the idea of keeping a pack of wipes with Thomas the Tank Engine or some wildflowers on it by their commode.

So, they simply put the word "Dude" in front of the word "Wipes" and now dudes across the land have cleaner backsides than they ever have in all of human history.

And who better to shill for the company than Chestnut, a man who has to offload a family reunion's worth of franks in a single sitting? 

At this point in his career, Chestnut is more familiar with the ins and outs (mostly outs) of the porcelain throne than Thomas J. Crapper, so I'm sure he wouldn't sign on to promote anything like this unless it can absolutely get the job done.