Tensions Flare In Post-Race Scrum, NASCAR Wives Model Bikinis, Bubba Wallace Says The Fix Is In, Chase Elliott's In Trouble & An All-Time Depressing Interview
Another week, another Monday NASCAR race. Mother Nature is certainly on one this season, and she ain't taking her foot off the gas.
But hey, at least we got a good race!
Just kidding. It was a typical New Hampshire snoozer. And don't you dare try to tell me differently. Whenever someone leads 90% of the laps, it's a snoozer.
Congrats, Martin Truex Jr. But that race stunk. Frankly, all NHS races do, which is why I never look forward to 'em. Great race fans up in New England, so I don't want to take the race away entirely, but I'm begging NASCAR to do something to that track. Anything.
OK, now that I've got that out of my system, let's dig in ...
We had a scuffle on pit-road between two of the most unlikely scufflers in the garage, Bubba Wallace gave a little wink-wink to NASCAR and William Byron, Chase Elliott is officially in trouble, Noah Gragson is beyond depressed and the bikini bug continues to take over the garage.
And that, folks, ain't a bad bug to get. Much better than the stomach bug.
Four tires, a couple cans of Sunoco racing fuel and maybe some freaking sun on a Sunday ... Monday (ish) Morning Pit-Stop -- the 'Glad I Didn't Skip Work For That Crap' edition -- is live!
We had a NASCAR scrum on pit-road
I'll be honest with you, I was gonna have to be SCRAPING the bottom of the barrel for content after that race until Michael McDowell and Ryan Preece saved me.
That's right -- Michael McDowell (pronounced MACdowell, of course) and Ryan Preece.
Ding, ding, ding! Not safe for kids. NSFW. Warning label!!
OK, I may have oversold it just a tad, but whatever. I told you, it's a bottom-of-the-barrel day.
So, it looks like McDowell slid up the track on the final lap and doored Preece against the wall. Pretty standard stuff for New Hampshire, frankly, but I also get why he's pissed.
Never great to be shoved into the wall on any lap, much less the final one.
How about that little shove from Preece, though? Ryan, buddy, if you're gonna shove someone after the race, make it count. You're either all in or you're all out. No in between. Never go the in between route, because then you just sort of look like a wussy.
Oh well. Thanks for the kinda-sorta content.
Moving on.
Has Chase Elliott just mailed it in this season?
You know who I'd LOVE to get some real content from? Chase Elliott. And I ain't talking about Livvy Dunne content, although that's fine, too.
I'm talking about actually competing for wins. Leading laps. Running up front. Mixing it up a bit.
I realize it's a lot to ask from someone who won the championship three years ago and won the most races a year ago, but I feel like it's not totally unfair.
Chase has been awful this season, folks. Beyond awful. Now, New Hampshire isn't his best track, so I wasn't expecting too much yesterday, but running 17th all day just to squeak out a 12th-place finish sounds an awful lot like ...
Ryan Newman.
I don't think Chase Elliott aspires to be Ryan Newman. Not this early in his career, at least. No offense, Rocket Man. Please don't hurt me.
Looking at the schedule, Elliott has Pocono, Richmond, a pair of road courses and Daytona left to find a win and make the playoffs. He ain't making it on points, so forget that.
It would seem to me that Watkins Glen is gonna be his best bet, but I wouldn't rule out Michigan either.
Chase, thoughts?
Bubba Wallace says the NASCAR fix is in!
Cheery Chase, as always.
Seriously, I truly don't understand what's happened this year.
I know he missed several races with the broken leg and then the suspension, but something is just off. And I'll also go ahead and throw out this prediction: if the season continues to be this bad over the final three months, there will be changes on the No. 9 team. Major ones. Those usually involve the crew chief.
Now, if you think Chase sounded depressed, take a listen to rookie Noah Gragson, who is going THROUGH IT this season.
Whoooooof. Great mustache, though. Still, it's as sad a 54 seconds as you'll watch all day. Being a rook in the Cup Series is tough, especially when you're not on a great team. A good team, but not a great one.
Noah's finding that out the hard way this year. At least he took a punch from Ross Chastain, though. That was cool.
Now, let's head on over to OutKick favorite Bubba Wallace, who sits right on the playoff cutline with five races left.
Bubba was solid again yesterday and is also someone I'd keep an eye on at Michigan, for what it's worth.
Him and William Byron, of course:
Kyle Busch crashed early to go home to Samantha, which ain't a bad strategy
Bubba's right, by the way. The most repeat winners the better for the No. 23 team.
And hey, Kyle Busch would certainly be a repeat winner ... if he didn't crash on like the second lap yesterday:
Poor Kyle. ROUGH weekend for Rowdy, who also wrecked during qualifying. Not great.
At least he got to chopper home early to OG wife Samantha, who was likely modeling vacation outfits when he walked in.
Again, not a terrible strategy.
Take us home, Hooters Gianna
I'm Team Green personally, but they all work. Just my opinion.
OK, that's pretty much it for today, folks. I know, it was a quick one, but spare me. I get that enough from my wife.
I told you, New Hampshire never really produces the best content. Wait! It did give us this 70-year-old, 20-pound lobster as the trophy, which was pretty cool I guess:
What a damn tank. Some drivers like to "pardon" the lobster and not murder it and eat it. I can promise you MTJ ain't one of them. Guy is sponsored by Bass Pro. What the hell do you think he did with it last night?
Take us home, Gianna Tulio -- and happy belated National Bikini Day!
Off to Pocono.