Chase Elliott Throws NASCAR 'Tantrum,' Bubba Wallace Pit Road Shove, Hypocrite Hamlin And Drunk Blaney
Looks like Chase Elliott and Bubba Wallace got the SOS memo from NASCAR to do something STAT to help ratings for a rain-delayed race on a holiday afternoon.
And buddy, they DELIVERED!
Chase saw red and hooked Denny Hamlin straight into the wall, while Bubba got a little testy with Aric Almirola, who it turns out does in fact have some fight in him. Who knew?
Did I have Bubba Wallace fighting Aric With An A on my 2023 NASCAR bingo card? Nope. We're obviously big supporters of it, though.
Now, Chase vs. Denny? Oh yeah, that's an easy one. Those two have had this weird, underlying beef ever since Martinsville in 2017, and it seems to resurface every few years. Is Denny Hamlin being a little bit of baby about it? Sure, but we'll get to it.
Let's see, what else happened Monday at Charlotte? Oh yeah, Ryan Blaney won the Coke 600, breaking a billion-race winless streak. That seems important?
We also had Jimmie Johnson (!!!) taking (maybe?) shots at Joey Logano, Michael Waltrip (remember him?) taking aim at Bud Light, and we obviously have to celebrate Hooters Gianna in honor of Ryan Blaney's big win.
Only fair.
Four tires, some medicine for Denny Hamlin's hypocrisy and maybe some anger management for Chase Elliott ... Monday Morning Pit-Stop -- the 'It's Actually Tuesday And I'm On Vacation So We're Gonna Hustle' edition -- is LIVE!
Denny Hamlin and Chase Elliott are best friends! (Photo by David Jensen/Getty Images)
NASCAR needs to suspend Chase Elliott, but Denny Hamlin needs to relax
Let's address the Chase Elliott-sized elephant in the room right off the bat.
Yes, NASCAR needs to suspend Chase. I think it's kinda silly because I believe drivers should police themselves, but the precedent was set last year when Bubba Wallace was parked after wrecking -- and attacking -- Kyle Larson.
So, yeah, not sure NASCAR has much of a choice here. I can assure you the folks over at Gateway ain't gonna be happy to have the sport's biggest money-maker not in the field next week, but the optics here don't give Chase much of a chance.
Yeah, I mean ... it's not great!
Now, let's context this bad boy up, because Denny Hamlin ain't exactly a saint.
For starters, Elliott was pissed because Denny "ran us over twice in the last four laps." That was from Chase's in-car radio after the wreck. Should he have responded by T-boning his ass into next week? No, probably not. Maybe Chase is having trouble back at home, who knows.
Let's also not forget that Denny Hamlin has done this about a billion times already this year -- not to the extent of what Chase did, but he's intentionally wrecked people.
Guys ... he ADMITTED to headhunting Ross Chastain not two months ago during his podcast and promptly got fined by NASCAR for it!
Hilarious. Insane level of pettiness out of Denny this year.
I show all of that not to excuse what Chase did yesterday, because he's gonna get what's coming to him, but to just show how sneaky funny it is to hear Denny Hamlin bitch about it after the fact.
Denny, buddy, you're just as much of an animal as Chase is. Stop acting like you're not.
Bubba Wallace set the precedent last year that intentionally hooking people is gonna get you suspended, but you, Denny, have already made it clear several times this year that you don't exactly respect your fellow drivers.
Everyone sees red in the NASCAR Cup garage and you're lying to yourself if you don't think so.
Bubba Wallace gets testy with Aric Almirola
And by the way, I LOVE No F--ks Given Denny Hamlin this year. I've said it multiple times.
We're in the #content business here, and guys like Denny, Ross Chastain, Chase Elliott and Bubba Wallace are the reason we have a pulse.
Speaking of Bubba!
I tell you what, these NASCAR security guards are absolute mood killers. They ruined what would've been an epic fight between Noah Gragson and Ross Chastain a few weeks ago, and now this cat doesn't even let Bubba get a shove in.
Imagine my surprise when I was scrolling through my phone during yesterday's rain delay and saw this little video circulating. Aric Almirola?
Aric Almirola?! No. Can't be true. The guy with the personality of a ham sandwich? Can't be.
Did I think my 15th Yuengling by the pool was messing with my head? For a second, sure. But alas, it was real and it was amazing. Bubba Wallace somehow pissed off Aric With An A Almirola enough to the point of getting physical. Incredible.
Note to self: do NOT cuss around Aric Almirola next to you see him down here in Daytona. Maybe don't flip him off, either.
That's him ... I know that was such a sneaky little zinger from Aric, too.
Boy, everyone was PISSED yesterday. What gives?
Ex-NASCAR driver Michael Waltrip combats Bud Light
You know what they need? A beer. Maybe 10. You trying sitting through a 24-hour rain delay and then run 600 miles without a beer. I can't imagine it's fun.
We got any Bud Light drinkers in the garage?! Nope? Nobody? Good! Get that piss water out of my sport.
And for anyone still having trouble getting off the Bud Light train, ex-driver Michael Waltrip -- you know, the guy who won the 2001 Daytona 500 -- is ready to offer his services.
Mikey, for those who don't know, owns a ton of breweries across the country and is getting ready to open some more.
And by some, I mean he apparently wants to open 100 new taprooms over the next five years. Seems a bit excessive if you ask me, but I'm also not a two-time Daytona 500 champ, so what do I know?
Anyway, Waltrip was asked about combatting the current Bud Light revolt and he basically said he plans to swoop in and take all the customers he can because beer shouldn't be political. What a concept!
"A cold beer should make everybody happy. It should never alienate anyone," he told Fox News. "I'll tell you something that is most important to me. The thing that I love the most about this project you see someone you don't know drinking one of your beers with a smile on their face. That's what it's all about to me. Just having a good time."
"We just want to have a good beer and have a good time and not be political about anything we do."
A lot has happened since Waltrip and Dale Jr. celebrated with some Budweiser back in 2001. (Photo by ISC Archives/CQ-Roll Call Group via Getty Images)
Does Jimmie Johnson hate Joey Logano?
Too bad the fellas over at Mulvaney Light didn't get that memo last month. Oh well.
Side note: how about that above picture for a throwback? Bet Mikey and Dale Jr. didn't know back in 2001 that celebrating on a Budweiser car would be considered taboo in 2023.
OK, couple quickies before I head back down to the pool and try to wash away the stench of my nine holes yesterday.
Welcome back, Jimmie Johnson!
The seven-time champ returned for his third race of the season, and promptly wrecked for the third time this season.
For those keeping count at home, Jimmie's finishes so far this year are 31st, 38th and 37th.
Not exactly my idea of padding the resume.
Hooters Gianna Tulio celebrates Ryan Blaney
How about that last stat?! Unreal. What a disaster of a return for Jimbo. To be fair, he wasn't exactly lighting it up his last few years before retiring, so I'm not sure anyone expected much.
But still, this is tough to watch -- especially for Joey Logano, who is apparently a terrible mirror-driver!
You know who's not? Ryan Blaney!
Congrats, Blaney. Welcome back to Victory Lane. Can anyone guess when Rhino last won a Cup race? Waaaaaaaaay back in Aug. 2021.
I've said for a while now that this year felt like a make-or-break year for Blaney, and winning a crown jewel race like the Coke 600 certainly takes a little pressure off him.
I mean, how can you not love this guy?
I bet you are, sport. Hydrate, hydrate, hydrate!
I'd imagine Gianna can help you get through it, though. Just a hunch.
Off to Gateway.