Woman Explains Why Christmas Is Hardest On The Mistresses

If you thought Christmas was tough on all the married women out there with kids, you're way off base. All the shopping for gifts, putting together the plans for what's on the menu, and making sure everything runs smoothly is easy compared to being the other woman.

On paper, the mistress doesn’t have any of the responsibilities that the wife does, but that doesn’t make the holidays any easier. In fact, it's the loneliest time of year according to someone who played the role of mistress. She called it a "festival of heartache, painful reminders and rejection."

A woman explains how being a mistress is tough during Christmas. (Image Credit: Getty)

"I know there are plenty of married women out there who'll hate me for dragging all this into the open. And I suppose I have only myself to blame, although never in my life had I dreamed of becoming someone's dirty little secret," she wrote for the Daily Mail.

"I first became the other woman 13 years ago, when I met my then-boyfriend at a party in Manhattan. I was 29 and he was older and more experienced at 45."

Now don’t go blaming her for getting involved with a married man. She's no homewrecker and had no idea when they started dating that he was married with kids. It took six months for her to find out the truth, by then it was too late. She was in love.

"I don't mind saying I was passionate about the guy. And, when Christmas rolled around, I hoped above all that he would invite me to spend it with him and his children, or at least make time to come and see me," she continued.

"That's when the excuses started. I was told it was 'too soon', that his children weren't ready, that he still had to co-parent with his wife. He claimed it would be 'inappropriate' for me to be anywhere near them."

Christmas for a mistress is tough and nobody has a harder time during the holidays than they do

She trusted him, went to parties alone, and explained that her boyfriend had to spend the holidays with his children. She spent Christmas with her parents and didn’t get to talk to her married boyfriend that much. He was busy pretending to be an awesome family man.

She didn’t have any romantic time with him during Christmas. Not even a secret meet up behind his family's back. The flowers, the gifts, the jewelry, none of them fixed the pain of not being able to spend the holidays with her boyfriend.

"Knowing he had chosen to be with her – not me – just made it even worse," she admitted. "The truth is that the other woman never comes first. Yes, you'll get a big gift, probably a bigger more splendid present than the one he gave his wife."

That's why Christmas is hardest on the mistresses out there. It wasn’t just Christmas, he was unavailable for other holidays as well. She finally realized after two years that he wasn’t leaving his wife for her.

That was more than a decade ago, and he's still with his wife. Who knows he's probably ruining another mistress's Christmas by ignoring her for his wife and kids.

It's hard out there for the other women. Pour a little eggnog out for them as you celebrate with your family and friends this Christmas.