What Food Smell Would You Wear As A Cologne?

The men's fragrance department in Macy's is about to smell like the food court.

In just the past week, we've had two major food brands announcing that they are releasing cologne and perfume-inspired scents for their products. Earlier today, Hellman's announced their "No. 8 Parfum de Mayonnaise," in collaboration with Tennessee Titans quarterback Will Levis, who famously has been seen in the past pouring mayonnaise into his coffee like a psychopath. 

As someone who absolutely hates and gags at the sheer thought of mayonnaise, I'll be skipping out on purchasing the 30ml bottle that costs $8. Although it appears I may be alone as its initial launch has already sold out!

AUNTIE ANNE'S PRETZELS > HELMANN'S MAYONNAISE 

Instead, I'll be going with the other latest scented grub release - Auntie Anne's pretzels.

That's right. You know how you're walking through a mall when all of a sudden that buttery, salivating-inducing scent of a fresh pretzel hits you? My God, let's go. And now you can smell like that WHENEVER YOU WANT?!

I may not know a lot of things, but I do know that the way to someone's heart is by smelling like Auntie Anne's pretzels. And no, this isn't a paid endorsement, I just know what works, alright?!

Which brings me to this question for you, the OutKick reader: If you could smell like ONE scented food, what would it be?

ITALIAN?

As someone who absolutely loves chicken parmigiana and my family's tomato sauce, I thought that would be my answer. But then you have to think about what happens as the cologne wears off throughout the day - suddenly your fresh sauce sours off into the kind that DiGiorno uses and gives you heartburn all night long, or maybe even like Chef Boyardi's Beefaroni!

Or even worse… like the Italian Stallion himself, New York Giants backup quarterback Tommy DeVito.

BBQ? FAST FOOD?

I'm sure many of you SEC college football readers love some BBQ - we all do! But you finger-licking wings and pulled pork sandwiches people also know that with that deliciousness comes that stench that you just can't get off of you. We all know that smell - some people call it the "fat people smell," but I like to put some respect to it and call it "the Unit smell," as a way to honor the big ol' people out there.

The same goes with fast food. Yes, I love Wendy's just as much as the next person and McDonald's fries? I mean come on now - but to smell like that oil and grease and fried food at 8am when you head INTO work is definitely going to give you some glares.

WATCH ME TALK ABOUT MCDONALD'S SCENTED CANDLES

OFF LIMITS

If we're going to begin going down into this new food-scented craze, then we have to set some guidelines.

First up, truffle should NEVER be allowed. That distinct, nauseating smell can be recognized blocks away and is just way too strong. Brussels sprouts? Never would I ever. Maple syrup? Don't email me when you wonder why you're still single after dousing yourself in that of all things.

The bottom line is, nobody wants to be THE smelly person - alright, Linus? It's one thing to come back from a lunch break smelling like hibachi, but to PURPOSELY go out of your way like that? Good luck. 

If we are going to go the route of this, then the safe bet are sweets like Auntie Anne's and scents that make you happy. Cinnabon, anybody?! Everyone loves dessert and, just like when you eat it, I'd imagine it's also important to use the fragrance in moderation as well. 

And if food smells isn't your thing, then don't worry, you can always purchase Jenna Berman's "Sex Water Cologne"

YOUR TURN! WHAT IS ONE FOOD SMELL THAT YOU WOULD WEAR AS A PERFUME OR COLOGNE?  TWEET ME: @TheGunzShow with your answers!