Vindicated! Apple 'Admits' iPhone Software Updates Purposely Slowed Down Phone, Will Pay Millions In Settlement

I KNEW IT!

For years now I have publicly been telling my friends, family, social media - hell, anyone that would listen, that Apple was screwing with us.

Why is it that every time we get an iOS software upgrade on our iPhone, they suddenly become slower?

At first, I sounded like a whacked out conspiracy theorist. But as I spoke with more and more people, I realized that nearly everyone was experiencing the same thing time and time again. As someone who has had multiple iPhones throughout the years, it became so frustrating that I would purposely stop allowing any automatic software updates. I was not going to allow Apple to keep ruining my day-to-day life. Damn the man, save the empire.

But guess what... we were right!

Apple will begin paying plaintiffs that were part of a class action lawsuit against their software update. (Photo credit should read CFOTO/Future Publishing via Getty Images)

APPLE REACHED A SETTLEMENT OVER UPGRADE ISSUES

On Friday, a judge instructed Apple to begin paying out hundreds of millions of dollars to over 3.3 million plaintiffs that were part of a 2020 class action lawsuit against the tech giant. The expected payout will cost Apple anywhere from $310 to $500 MILLION DOLLARS in the end. The plaintiffs argued that Apple's iPhones were using "software throttling" tactics, which deliberately slowed down user's phones so they would purchase new ones. (Exactly what I've been arguing!)

Apple has never officially admitted to any wrongdoing, but rather argued that the updates slowed phones down because of battery issues, yadda yadda yadda. The agreement originally came back in 2020, but like all things, it took years for anything to actually happen. That all changes now with expected payments in the coming days and weeks.

Apple CEO Tim Cook talks to coworkers. (Photo by Justin Sullivan/Getty Images)

HOW MUCH MONEY ARE WE TALKING?

Unfortunately, litigants are only going to get anywhere from $65-$80 dollars. To be honest with you, that absolutely stinks, especially when I look back at the thousands of dollars I've given to Apple. (Also, why the hell do they keep changing their charging ports?! Well, we know why...)

Regardless though, it is definitely a moral victory for the little person standing up to the big tech giant. A win is a win people!

An interesting side note - iPhone users are currently getting a new software update alert on their phones. I'm sure they are with "the best intentions," but because Apple has screwed with us so many times throughout the years, I know for a fact many people will purposely not update. You can't fool us anymore, Apple.

What's really interesting about the timing is another thing that I've argued for years (and have now been proven right with Apple's settlement). Why was it that major software updates seemed to come around September or October? Conveniently, when new iPhones were also being released, and in the lead up to Black Friday - one of the biggest shopping days of the year (as well as the holiday season where people are willing to spend money on new things... like Apple iPhones). Hmmm.

Either way, if you were one of the millions of people that were part of the class action lawsuit, I want you to go and buy yourself a delicious steak (medium rare) with the settlement money.

You deserve it my friend. And also, never trust big tech.

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