The 1996 Hooters Calendar Was Incredible Pop Art, Landon Dickerson Shows Off His Stripes & Tyson Looks Ready
Here we go again with another TNML sticker dump
With mowers being fired up weeks early across the Midwest due to global warming, Thursday Night Mowing League members have officially entered their Spring Training period. That means many of you are hammering me about stickers for your mowers.
It's time to sit in the basement drinking Kirkland margaritas and filling envelopes until I'm out of stickers. Now, please keep in mind when I do this, I receive hundreds and hundreds of emails all at once. At this point in the TNML era at OutKick, I've sent out at least a couple of thousand stickers. I'm doing my best here.
Why don't you get a post office box?
Because when you email me, it's a personal relationship between the TNML and the league. We have a connection. No, I'm not selling your email address. No, I'm not giving your home address to T-shirt Manager Olivia G. so she can target you with mailers.
The Chinese are already listening to your conversations and they have your email address, your social security number and know how many beers you're pounding on weekends at the golf course.
Those initial sticker requests sometimes turn into, "Hey, I need to send in my mowing report to Joe. I'll email it."
With that, here we go again. It's time to stuff envelopes. Send those addresses.
Email: joekinsey@gmail.com
• Aaron P. writes:
I’ve requested a sticker 4 times and never received one. Maybe 5th time is a charm lol. Please.
Kinsey:
I swear I've sent an envelope to your town. There must be multiple people in that WV city requesting stickers. Anyway, today is your lucky day because when I go get Mrs. Screencaps a coffee this morning, this envelope is going into the mailbox at the end of our neighborhood.
Now, after that it's on the USPS.
Remember….it's Spring Training! I need to get with the TNML committee on an official Opening Day date.
Denver snow, Travel Ball Mama Bear® swingers and Augusta
• Jon in Denver, going for the heat check and waiting for the Denver snowpocalypse:
I remember the days having to wake up and turn on the radio for the news DJ to alphabetically go through everything that was closed on a snow day. Now? I’m sitting in Denver, anticipating a major snow event (10-20in) and they already called a snow day with a total accumulation (9pm) of 0 inches (its raining). Having lived in Denver for a couple decades, I know we could get hammered with an upslope, but at least make the kids sweat through the night anticipating the snow day. Don’t just hand it out like a participation ribbon.
Enjoy Augusta. I had the privilege and honor of attending a Friday in 2011…One of the best days of my life. The feeling of walking down 11 tee box and overlooking Amen Corner is an experience all lovers of life need to experience. We had VIP passes and I was able to check out a townhome (off the first tee), the pro shop, clubhouse, Tom Watson and Freddie Couples enjoying a burger, Vijay Singh’s caddy yelling at us for being too loud pff the 10th tee, and drinking an exorbitant amount of azaleas (WONDERFUL), and Jason Day's girlfriend, now wife, Ellie..WOW. Don’t use a debit card if you go to a gentleman’s club…Look for John Daley’s bus…he’ll be there, somewhere. Visited the Hooters bikini contest and had VIP access, went to the back lot and snuck on the Hooters bus and I may or may not have taken this sign which is full of great wisdom.
Why are the Denver Nuggets getting shit for not going to the White House on an off day in the final stretch of playoff run? How many teams didn’t celebrate a championship with a White House visit during Trump’s presidency?
Thankful my son isn’t very athletic so I don’t have to go through the rec/travel ball dilemma. My brother endured years of travel soccer ball…with A LOT of travel ball soccer moms that were very adventurous in those $299/night Hampton Inns with a cuck chair and continental breakfast…just sayin.
Wanted to end with another Athlete everyone can appreciate (unless you’re Sheryl Swoopes, who CAN be racist, as her platform affords her a certain level of "power" or influence of the 10’s of people that actually listen to her…) Caitlyn Clark is the epitome of the Midwest mentality. No one is bigger than anyone else and everyone is deserving of respect. She gets it. It’s not because she’s white and it’s not because she isn’t black. It’s because she is a good human that makes her special. Need to appreciate those simple acts she takes that mean so much to others. She understands the path paved for her by others and the responsibility to be that spark of inspiration to the next generation. She isn’t pulling hair…just sayin'.
Kinsey:
That's an email! Damn. I count six topics that Screencaps readers care about spread over five paragraphs. Jon caught the hint that we're going to associate the Travel Ball Mama Bears® with Hampton Inn around here.
BTW, we're 24 days out from my flight to Atlanta with Canoe Kirk for Augusta. I need to check back with the Screencaps readers who were going to join up for the Screencaps Augusta Invitational on April 8.
Great email, Jon. It got the blood pumping this morning.
Screencaps at Augusta
• Don J. says:
Hope to run into you on Tuesday at the Masters. I’ll buy you a beer and a pimento cheese sandwich. See if you can somehow get an invite into Berkmans Place there. Supposed to be awesome spot.
Kinsey:
Fingers crossed…I'll be wearing the new TNML polo. We just have to get these things produced. You won't be able to miss me.
Sidenote: Canoe Kirk has never been to a golf tournament event of any kind. His first time is Tuesday at Augusta. My only golf tournament event experience was Firestone the year before the FedEx event left for Memphis.
Has this happened to any of you?
I'm convinced the Amazon warehouse workers pull this prank from time to time to break up the monotony. If so, I sorta respect it. In college, I worked for FedEx loading the delivery trucks. I know a little bit about the business. I understand the grind. I remember the guy working on the line who would slip a jelly bean box off a conveyor and purposely break open the boxes. I cannot confirm or deny that the guy would help himself to jelly beans.
Now I have to go through the process of getting the other 11 pens that were supposed to be mailed.
School system email panhandling MUST STOP
Soccer is worse
• Dale H. writes:
Thanks for stepping up coaching town ball. If you have a kid that is outstanding the people in the know will find him. These travel leagues are just money grappling. But soccer is worse.
Kinsey:
Dale, I'm not going to argue with you there. At least the soccer people tend to have more money than the losers panhandling Super Bowl squares within the travel ball world. But I will not argue that the soccer clubs are vacuuming up the dollars. I'm actually jealous of their business.
The more I think of it, I wish I was in the business of stealing money off parents and their emotions over youth sports. That's what I'm jealous of, Anonymous in Tennessee.
Barry in Birmingham shows off his Brougham!
Barry's dad left him his beloved Cadillac and now the son is actually left trying to figure out what to do with this beauty. His driveway is already loaded with cars, but he can't just bring himself to dumping his father's cherished ride.
• Barry writes:
Hey Joe you are the best!
I knew the Screen Caps community would come through. Attached are a few pictures of the Caddy. When I drive this classic it’s like stepping back in time. Smooth ride and lots of looks from other folks on the road. As I stated yesterday, it was literally only driven to church and out to eat by my parents.
Thanks for all do!
• Mark T. in Southern Maryland writes:
Tell the guy with the Caddy to list it with Hagerty’s. They provide insurance for classic cars and have a fantastic auction system. And many other resources for car nuts.
Or, like you said, drive it! Float down the road in your cruiser! Enjoy it.
• Stacy R. writes:
Regarding the car, if Barry has too many cars now, take the tag and insurance off the car and put it in a storage facility until he is an empty nester. Then bring that bad boy out and drive 15 miles under the speed limit everywhere he goes.
Never forget we're fortunate to rise up for another day of life
• Indy Daryl checks in…speaking of which, I need to check in with Indy D. to find out if the Screencaps Ragnar Relay team has been training:
On the road to Cincinnati this morning and couldn’t help but snap a photo of the wonderful sunrise. Have a great day!
Flavored sunflower seeds?
• Mike T. in Idaho writes:
TGC needed new Brooks so we went to Dicks, had no idea flavored Sunflower seeds were THE thing!
Dicks says they get wiped out every weekend!
Kinsey:
Travel ball kids love them, Mike.
Do you guys actually work on those laptops on airplanes or is it for show?
• Chris B. in Florida writes:
When I was a road dog, I never left work undone thinking I could get it done on the plane. The reason: that fellow passenger in front who — despite my polite pre-flight request because I’m tall — would recline his seat to the point that I wouldn’t be able to see the screen anyway. I don’t actually think it’s much of a flex; I think it’s a way to make yourself look like a drone who's gonna get your ass handed to you by your boss if you don’t get that TPS report done.
For Food Bank Clay W.: have you been able to get any publicity/support/sponsorship from your local media? Assuming that this isn’t your wheelhouse, you should be able to find a marketing company that would build you a website (with donation button) and get you in front of the kind of people who could help you promote your mission. The marketing company should do this pro bono, as an "in-kind donation" for which they can claim either business value or a tax deduction. An example of this is in Fort Myers, where the CBS affiliate promotes the big food bank in town pretty relentlessly, and I’m sure they get brownie points from the FCC and/or the tax man.
• Michael F. in Ponte Vedra Beach, FL writes:
Your work just continues to elevate and illuminate all that is right in our once proud nation. Regarding business travel, while I am not a million mile guy I averaged around 75,000-100,000 annual air miles from 2014 through March 17, 2020 ( the day the world shut down) I may have read a summary report or two but made it habit not to work while flying. I subscribe to the theory of State Retention, which basically posits if you prepare on an airplane (the physical and mental state you are in) you should be in that same state when it’s go time. Same story with preparing for a meeting while sitting down with a drink or two, you’d better be a couple deep when conducting that meeting. It’s a theory and practice that has served me well over the years and never let me down.