Texas Swimmer Ella Myers Ready For Red River, Jay Cutler's New Girl Is A Rocket, Walmart Fight & Marissa Lawrence Enjoys London
It's Texas-Oklahoma weekend, Jay Cutler has new life and my two-year-old slept through the night last night for the first time in a week.
Talk about starting the weekend off right! Time to capitalize while I'm still at 100% charge. No shot she's doing it two nights in a row.
Welcome to a Friday Nightcaps -- otherwise known as the one you all just skim through while at the stoplight on the way to the liquor store down the road. I've actually got a drive to make this afternoon, too, so we're gonna get straight to the point.
Texas swimmer Ella Myers is BACK and ready to take a dip into the Red River ahead of Saturday's showdown with Oklahoma. Jay Cutler and new girlfriend Samantha Robertson made their big debut today and it appears our man very much has a pulse post-Cavallari.
Trevor Lawrence turns 24 today, so we'll naturally check in with wife Marissa. Duh. We'll also do a little gambling because I'm up already on the weekend and you are too if you read yesterday's Nightcaps.
We also had an absolute WAR between a cop and woman in a motorized scooter at the Walmart that I wrote about earlier but need to revisit again here. I love the Walmart. Absolute Wild Wild West over there.
Bring back the Lobster tanks, you cowards!
Maybe we'll even check the mail today, too. We'll see.
Settle in, grab a Shipyard Pumpkinhead to celebrate the first weekend of October and try to keep up. It's a Friday Nightcaps!
Texas swimmer Ella Myers ready for Oklahoma
It's a huge weekend of college football. Although, I feel like we say that every single Friday. God, this time of year is the best.
Anyway, it's time to fire up the Red River Rivalry for the final time in the Big 12, and Texas swimmer Ella Myers -- a Nightcaps OG -- is ready to rumble.
Texas is a 5.5-point favorite, but I kinda like the over 60.5. Feel like this game is always a shootout. Alabama favored on the road at Texas A&M by 2.5? I'll dabble. Feel like the Tide kinda-sorta have their swag back for the time being and can you really ever trust Jimbo?
LSU-Missouri over 63.5 also seems a little juicy from my end.
I know 12.5 is a lot for the Dolphins to be giving on Sunday -- double-digits is always a wild card in the NFL -- but this has bounce-back written all over it. Giants are also coming off a short week. I'll sprinkle a little and see what happens.
OK, enough gambling. Time to swim with Texas Ella!
Marissa Lawrence and Trevor Lawrence celebrate 24 across the pond
Texas forever!
Let's head across the pond and check in on Trevor Lawrence, who's been stuck over there for a week now because the Jags are apparently just London's team now.
They got back on track somewhat last weekend -- mostly because Desmond Ridder is an awful QB -- and now they welcome in Josh Allen. Good luck. I still haven't fully recovered from what he did to us last weekend. Animal.
Allen, by the way, is currently sitting at over/under 1.5 TD passes. I'd hammer the over and feel good about it. Nice way to cure a Sunday morning hangover, too.
Anyway, all that to say Trevor Lawrence turns 24 today and wife Marissa deserves some shine.
Speaking of NFL WAGs, Jay Cutler is BACK!
Happy birthday, Trevor!
Now, let's all welcome Jay Cutler back to class! The ex-Bears/Dolphins legend made his triumphant return to the internet today thanks to new girlfriend Samantha Robertson.
Cutler and fireball Kristin Cavallari split about three years ago, and it's been pretty quiet on Jay's front ever since. Not anymore, though.
Our man is BACK with a vengeance and he's out for blood.
Now that Sam's out of the way, let's all get to the real reason why we're here ...
Jay Cutler highlights!
Lets check in with Walmart
Sitting through the Jay Cutler experience with the Dolphins in 2017 was such a rollercoaster.
One week he literally looked uninterested and the next he torched the Patriots for three touchdowns on Monday Night Football. What a ride.
Speaking of wild rides, let's head on up to the Westchester County Walmart and check the temperature:
Mail time!
What a sight. I wrote about it this morning, so read that when you're inevitably dry-heaving in a dive bar toilet later tonight.
Bottom line? If you've been to Walmart at any point in your life, this doesn't even faze you. This isn't even the top three wildest things I've seen at a Walmart.
Hell, just last week I literally tripped over a homeless guy who was sleeping in the clothing section. Hand to God. What an establishment.
OK, let's check the mail before we close up shop for the week:
From Oklahoma Ryan:
Thought you might appreciate this. Only good thing to come out of the “you know who” coverage by the nfl media. It’s really tiring. Even as a chiefs homer I can’t stand the added tmz like coverage of the game. I want people to talk about how bad our wide receivers are and how no one can catch a cold on this offense besides Kelce with his pfizer shots, not Taylor f--king swift. (Disclaimer I can’t identify any Taylor swift song post 2010 so I REALLY don’t understand what all the fuss is about).
Anyways, rough break for the dolphins. I’d like to see tyreek win another one. Was a homers dream come true when he landed in kc after his okst days.
Have a great week (and never bet the chiefs except in straight up win/loss scenarios, they always let you down).
Sharks, Phils and Baker, oh my!
Appreciate Ryan being an excellent Nightcaps listener and NOT mentioning you-know-who by name. A+ for you. We don't speak about her around here because we have an ounce of class.
Funny meme, too. About the only good thing to come out of that game last week.
OK, rapid fire time because I have to hit the road.
Ever wonder what it's like to get eaten by a shark? Me too! Turns out, it ain't that bad:
Oddly peaceful in there, huh? Who knew. Beautiful way to die.
Next!
Phillies fans are just different. I'm a Red Sox fan and even I can admit we have nothing on them. Not even close. They're a different breed over there, man. They'll chew you up and spit you out, and then turn around and buy $4,500 worth of beer for an entire section of fans.
Also, 100% chance this rando was obliterated when he made this decision and woke up to some absolute demons the next morning. We've all been there.
On our way out, let's check in with Baker and Emily Mayfield ahead of the Texas-Oklahoma game. Baker, who is somehow 3-1 this year, is in town for the big game.
Emily isn't, but she makes a cameo here for obvious reasons.
Let's go have a damn weekend.
OutKick Nightcaps is a daily column set to run Monday through Friday at 4 p.m. (roughly, we’re not robots).
Does Texas swimmer Ella Myers give the Longhorns the edge over Oklahoma? Email me at Zach.Dean@OutKick.com.