Texas Coach Jeff Banks Marries Stripper 'Pole Assassin' Whose Monkey Once Bit A Kid On Halloween

This is my kind of love story.  It has it all.  There's a college football coach who reportedly left his family, a stripper nicknamed "Pole Assassin," and an emotional support monkey.  Who could forget about the monkey?

Back in 2021, the world - outside the Jerry Springer Show - was first introduced to Texas Longhorns special teams coordinator Jeff Banks' stripper girlfriend, Dani Thomas aka Pole Assassin.  Her pet monkey, who has performed on the pole with her, had allegedly bit a kid on Halloween.

The Longhorns coach and the Pole Assassin made it through that controversy and over the weekend they became husband and wife.  Another win for all the hopeless romantics out there.

The newlywed Mrs. Banks took her Instagram account underground after tying the knot, but not before posting some pictures of the wedding along with a statement about her big day.

"Here’s some photos …First of all let me start saying, thank you to everyone for helping me turn this into the best day ever.  When I was a kid I daydream about being a wedding planner, so my husband trusted me to plan our wedding.  And this was a day I got to see my hard work pay off for six months I have been decorating, making floral for arrangements, putting details on everything.  Now I can finally breathe.  I absolutely love that," she said.

Congratulations To Coach Banks And Pole Assassin

Coach also recognized the wedding on social media as well.

Unlike his wife, Banks hasn't taken his account underground.  He kept his comments brief while letting everyone know that the couple was off to Barcelona for their honeymoon.

He wrote, "Incredible 72 hours with our family and closest friends! We truly love you all now off to Barcelona for our honeymoon! 🤘🏼🤘🏼🤘🏼."

Congratulations are in order, obviously.  It's not known if Pole Assassin is still hitting the pole or whether she still has her emotional support monkey or not, but we do know that love can conquer all.

These two have proven that.

There's nothing getting in their way.  No family, no monkey controversy, and no coaching job.  Talk about a couple setup for happily ever after.