Taylor Mathis' Bikini-Fueled Aruba Trip Was A Huge Content Win For The Internet, Derrick Henry Bullies & MEAT!
Welcome to Ragnar Relay Week; 12 Screencaps readers will take on a 200-mile relay run through the middle of Kentucky THIS WEEK
I think it was back in the winter when Indy Daryl came to me and asked if it was possible to put together a Team Screencaps to participate in a Ragnar Relay, where teams of runners run three stages each to ultimately complete a mega-run in a matter of like 36 hours.
My message to Daryl was clear: I will support this plan, but I WILL NOT participate. I finished a Tough Mudder in Tahoe years ago and that was the biggest endurance accomplishment of my life. I remember sitting at dinner inside the Ritz-Carlton steakhouse and I couldn't eat. I sat there like I'd been beaten by Mike Tyson for six hours. That might be one of the most regrettable moments in my life. There I was at a Ritz-Carlton with an open tab thanks to a sponsor and I couldn't eat or drink after that Tough Mudder.
So, my ass isn't running in some road race across Kentucky. I left this event to the pros and Indy Daryl has formed quite a team. I must add that it's a diverse team! Take that, lefties!
I don't care who runs for Team Screencaps –– Indy Daryl could've found a trans runner and I would've said HELL YEAH! –- I just want this team to finish in Lexington. I CANNOT take any further disappointments like I felt in 2023 when Millennial Chris B. in Bowling Green told my text group that he lost to Mayor Pete Buttigieg in the Michigan Ironman because he was taking a dump and Mayor Pete passed him by.
It's haunting to hear my longtime canoe partner so down and out after that performance.
This Friday at 6 a.m. at the Jim Beam Distillery, the journey for Team Screencaps begins and they BETTER cross that finish line in Lexington next Saturday or Indy Daryl is FIRED.
Will it be easy at 2 a.m. as one of the runners is trudging along in the Kentucky darkness? Will it be easy for these runners as they're running up a Kentucky hill while they could've been on the couch watching college football?
Hell no, it won't be easy.
But there's a mission at hand, and it's time to perform. The talk is over. It's time to focus. The first beer in Lexington is on me!
Meet some of the runners:
Alysoune (Aly)
27 years old
Runner 11
Ragnar miles: 13.5 miles
Expectations: This will be my first long distance relay race, I'm looking forward to pushing myself and cheering on others as we run throughout the night. Since I'm running lower mileage, I hope i can run a few faster paced miles for the team.
Running career thus far: I ran D1 track and field for 3 years at New Mexico State University and then 2 years at Tennessee State University. After college I fell in love with the sport Canicross (canine cross country). I now compete competitively with my German Shepherd, Milly.
Best moment: This year, we won our first North American Canicross 5k race. I broke my ankle 5 months prior, trail running. My GSD had also undergone ACL surgery. It was a hard but rewarding journey back to racing.
Jake
52
Runner #8
Ragnar Miles: 12.5 miles
My expectations are to finish all of my portions and try to stay at or below my goal pace of nine minutes a mile. I am also looking forward to running my first RAGNAR race with eleven total strangers that I met on the internet!
I have a running goal of 600 miles a year which averages out to 50 miles a month. I've been able to meet or exceed that total for seven years in a row. I didn't start running regularly until I was around 45 years old and now I can't imagine not running. If you told me that seven years ago I would have said you were crazy!
My best moment running was entering and completing a half marathon in under two hours (1:58 on the nose). The last two miles were awful but crossing the finish line was a great feeling.
You didn't ask for work or life info but if you want to include it, I've been a sheriff's deputy in southern Arizona for 25 years, I have four adult children and four grand children.
Greg (I'd go with "GenX Greg" but I'm a firm believer that you can't give yourself a nickname)
52
Running in the 5 spot
Ragnar Miles: 21-ish miles
Expectations: I want to do something I've never done before and have fun with a bunch of people while doing it.
Running Career thus far: Started running in 2003 on a whim when a friend said she wanted to run the Chicago Marathon that year (she didn't make it to the starting line). 15+ full marathons in seven states, a 3-hour finish at the Boston marathon, and a full Ironman triathlon later and I'm still lacing the shoes up.
Best moment... might be a tie between having my whole family watch me run Boston and accomplishing ever lawyer's dream by literally chasing an ambulance during the last 400 yards of the Toledo Marathon.
Millennial Chris B in Bowling Green
Age - 35
Ragnar position 9
Ragnar Miles: 21.1
Expectations for the event - running in the hills of Kentucky, I’m expecting skunks, possible cocaine bears, hopefully some shacks I can pick up some good shine while on the run, and enjoying time away from the kids with my wife.
Running career thus far - VA Beach 1/2 marathon, 3 70.3 Ironman events, numerous sprint and Olympic triathlons.
Best moment from your running career - starting, however my most infamous moment is being beat by Mayor Pete Bootycheeks and his arsenal of armed secret service due to a late surge of guttural force forcing me to hit the portajohn on the run of Ironman Michigan in 2023.
Sarah
Age: 36
Ragnar position (1-12): 12
Number of miles for the Ragnar: 17.8
Expectations for the event: To have so much fun and see some beautiful Kentucky landscape.
Running career thus far: I started running as a sophomore in high school in 2003 and I haven't stopped, so I've been running for 21 years. I have run too many 5ks and 10ks to count, I have run around 5 half marathons, 2 marathons in 2023 which catapulted me into ultra running with the Mid-State Mile in Franklin, TN, in 2023 (30.8 miles) and 2024 (36.3 miles), Death by 5k in Memphis, TN, in 2024 (50k), and now, the Ragnar relay!
Best moment from your running career: The Mid-State Mile in Franklin, TN, both years. It's a last-man-standing style race that pushes you to the end of yourself and the community around it is unmatched.
Ben
Age: 46
Ragnar position #: 7
Miles: 17ish
Expectations: to survive! I signed up for this because I’ve always wanted to run a Ragnar, but didn’t have 11 friends crazy enough to do it with me. I’m getting older and my window for physical challenges is closing, and I wanted to "Do hard things", so I finally got off the couch and decided to do it when I saw it on Screencaps. It’s going to be really hard, but really fun, especially doing it with such an eclectic group. I’m definitely not the fasted in the group nor am I in the best shape of my life, but I’ve trained hard, lost almost 15 pounds, and I’m ready to suffer, but in a good way.
Running career: probably the least accomplished of the group, started in my early 30’s.
- many 5 & 10k’s
- 4 half marathons
- 2 marathons
- 1 tough mudder (12 miles so I’m counting it!)
Best moment: sub 2 hour half marathon, at The Middle Half in Murfreesboro, TN. I am not the fastest runner, and it took me multiple tries but I finally came in under 2 hours.
Jym
Age: 38.
Ragnar Position 1.
Miles: More than I can count (18.7 miles).
Expectations for the event: I will more than likely shred my calf, but I'll finish somehow (both realistic expectations).
Running Career: Used to run more when I was younger, two (2) half marathons total.
Best moment from Running career: Running the Glass City half-marathon many, many moons ago.
Amber
Age: 35
Ragnar Position: 2
Number of Miles: 17.8
Expectations: You know, I've always said I wanted to do The Kentucky Bourbon Trail, but on foot for 200 miles wasn't really how I envisioned it. It's my first Ragnar, so the only thing I know for sure is that I will be tired and sweaty. But I love an adventure, so I'm excited for some team bonding and, of course, the whiskey at the finish line.
Running Career Thus Far: Short. I ran a half marathon 10 years ago, and I've done a handful of silly themed 5Ks. Then I got into competitive bodybuilding and stopped distance running altogether. When Joe asked if I wanted to do the Ragnar, though, I thought, "Why not?" So I started a training plan early this summer, warmed up with a half marathon in Nashville last weekend, and here goes nothing!
Best Moment from Running Career: I once ran a Thanksgiving Turkey Trot in the snow in Indianapolis. I believe the temperature was 17 at the start line. It was surprisingly fun, even though I couldn't feel my face.
Indy Daryl (Captain of Kinsey's Folly)
Age: 38
Ragnar Position: 6
Number of Miles: 20ish
Expectations: Having done two previous road Ragnar races, I have a pretty good idea of the racing. It will be a blast to do it with people from across the country whom I have never met before, getting stuck in a van for 36ish hours together, watching, cheering, and rooting for everyone as we all "Do Hard Things" together!
Running Career Thus Far: I started running because at the ripe age of 23, after having been married for 6 months, I tried to put on a vest that I had previously loved to wear. Suffice to say, it didn't fit..... thus, my running career started. I have since completed >25 half Marathons, 3 full marathons, 2 road Ragnar races, 2 trail Ragnar races (1 as an ultra, 30 plus miles) and generally just love the thrill of a good long run.
Best moments: Weirdly, seeing my father-in-law cheering me on during the last mile of my first full marathon after the back half of the race had little to no spectators or support. Honestly, have never been so happy to see him, and nearly started crying. I finally ran a sub 1 hour 50 minute half marathon in 2018 (1:48) and have been chasing that high ever since. And my most proud running achievement was probably running the Atlanta Trail Ragnar as an Ultra this past spring. Not something I ever saw myself doing, but now have all sorts of crazy thoughts of fun adventures rolling around in my head!
Name: Dan
Age: 47
Ragnar position: 4
Number of miles for the Ragnar : 12.5
Expectations for the event: Pull my weight, and hopefully have a good time.
Running career thus far: Ran on High School and Collegiate teams in my younger days and finished a few marathons, I have been slacking the last few years, but this was a great way to be motivated to get back at it
Best moment from your running career: My 2nd marathon when I had a great race at the Boston Marathon.
Speaking of Kentucky
- Randy T. writes:
Check out the third game.
Speaking of football
Do we like college football when it's more like the NFL and games like Georgia-Alabama have less meaning? Don't get me wrong, the energy from Saturday's game was absolutely insane, but do you think we will lose a little bit of that energy as the years go on with the college football playoff system?
Don't get me wrong, I love the 12-team playoff. I just wonder if we'll lose a little buzz for these regular-season games when Bama-Georgia could play three times this season.
Speaking of energy, stop and think about that Oct. 19 Bama-Tennessee game in Knoxville. All that stands in the way of that showdown is a UT road game at Arkansas this week followed by the Gators coming to Knoxville.
My current Top 5:
Bama
Georgia
Texas
Tennessee
Ohio State (the defense showed cracks in the 1st half against Michigan State)
I'm starting to hear from the Johnson City, TN gang again
On Saturday, I sent a message to Galen D., the leader of the Johnson City Gang to see how he's doing with the Hurricane Helene destruction that has hit the area. I fully understand that power is still a major issue to go along with everything else that's happening in eastern Tennessee.
I did hear from Bob R., another member of the JCTN gang who checked in.
As soon as I hear more from readers in that part of the country, I'll pass it along.
I'm not sure if the group has banded together in a relief effort or what's going on. Hang tight.
Email: joekinsey@gmail.com
By the way, look at this loser in action. What, are you going to ban gas-powered chainsaws like the ones that are helping cut through the debris?
Live a little bit – USE THE DAMN TOWEL!
That's it, I'm going to spend my week GOING OFF on Stanley-succin' suburban travel ball moms, and their fall towels, and their insistence on going to pick apples and other crazy shit that didn't exist until social media came along and exacerbated the madness that is some lady named Penny telling men they better not touch a towel.
Do you have these battles in your household? Tell me stories:
Email: joekinsey@gmail.com
Last week, Mrs. Screencaps made a big announcement that she had purchased pumpkin pillow covers and she was converting the Christmas pillows into fall harvest pillows for our living room.
Yesterday, Screencaps Jr. moved those pillows to the family room couch which means they're about to be USED by our two boys who will lounge right on top of those pillows.
We're about to learn real fast if orders come down from Mrs. Screencaps on pumpkin pillow usage laws around here.
Stay tuned.
What a week it's going to be for Tigers fans
I can't believe Travel Ball Hardo Chris B. in Houston hasn't emailed yet to tell me how his Astros will sweep MY Tigers.
For those of you who plan to jump on the Tigers bandwagon, the series will be played at 2:30 ET Tuesday-Thursday on ABC. Join in the fun. Let's go end Travel Ball Hardo Chris B.'s season.
- Sean C. in Granger, IN writes:
I never knew about your affinity for the Tigers. I know you’ve been in Toledo long enough to have probably seen many Mud Hens games, and you’re only about hour from Detroit.
I’m a life-long Tigers fan living in a mostly Cubs (but some Sox) country. So helping the Sox get that MLB record for losses doesn’t hurt my feelings.
My brother and I went to game 3 of the 2006 World Series (in St Louis), game 3 of the 2012 World Series (in Detroit) and game 3 of the 2013 ALDS……all losses. We vowed to never go to a game 3 playoff game ever again. Lol
But while we used to go to opening day a lot, the weather was often shitty, so we said "screw it, let’s go to Spring Training!" It’s a tradition that celebrated its 10th year this past spring. Even young pitcher Keider Montero is a part of the TMNL once he signed my hat this spring.
We’ve seen some great games in Detroit over the years, including the combined no-hitter against the Blue Jays last July.
And post-COVID, the area around the stadium is tremendous, and mostly safe. I’m thrilled to see the Tigers back in the playoffs. If I make it up for any future playoff games, I’ll let you know in case you are up there as well.
There have been lots of articles written in the last week about this team. But this was a fact I wasn’t quite aware of, and as long as the ownership isn’t super super cheap, this could be the beginning of a nice run.
They had a good run with some loaded teams for about 8 years. No Championships though. Recency bias may be at play, but this team sure is fun to watch. And I don’t think it a coincidence that they’re run started when Javy Baez went on the IL for the year.
Is this true?
- Bear and the Philly Boys writes:
After 28 years of marriage, this is the truth.
Top 5 Arcade Games
- Benny in Yukon, OK writes:
Good morning Joe! I really enjoyed the arcade games draft on the Ricky Cobb show... it was a delightful trip down the nostalgia road. You hit the gold standard with Pac-Man. But some of the other choices missed the mark. In that spirit, I offer my Top 5 arcade games:
Ms. Pac-Man
Double Dragon
Ikari Warriors
Pitfall
Donkey Kong (Mario's debut!!!)
Frogger (honorable mention)
It's baseball playoff time.... Let's Go Tigers!!!!!
Airport parking lot mysteries
- David C. has a theory on how cars are left in the lots for years, like the "D Nice" car that has been parked at U.S. Park outside Detroit Metro for at least five years:
This is another possibility of the Detroit metro parking lot mystery. Revenge.
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That's it. We're ready to roll for one of the biggest weeks of the year for Screencaps with the Thursday Night Mowing League finals and the Ragnar Relay. Let's go have a big week.
Have a great work week.
Email: joekinsey@gmail.com