Starbucks Launches Pork Latte In China And The Only Thing More Disgusting Than How It Sounds Is Its Price

Back in 1993 the band Primus put out an album called Pork Soda. It's one of their best albums and features some of their biggest songs, including "My Name Is Mud."

I always figured the album's name and its title track were essentially picked because of how disgusting the idea of a pork-flavored beverage would be. It's the last thing anyone would want to drink.

However, the folks at Starbucks have decided to give this idea – which should've only ever existed within the fantastically weird brain of Les Claypool – a whirl, and are now offering a pork-flavored latte.

Unfortunately for you — but fortunately for me — this is only available in China, and no, I won't be hopping on a flight to try this thing out. 

If they bring it to the US of A, I'd take a begrudging swig of it for the sake of journalism.

It sounds like a terrible idea. Although, some would argue that a dash of pork flavor would be an upgrade to normal Starbucks coffee.

It sounds like something out of a Primus song, but Starbucks in China are mixing up some pork lattes. (CFOTO/Future Publishing via Getty Images)

According to Fox Business, that's exactly what "Abundant Year Savory Latte" or "Lucky Savory Latte" has. It's a pork-flavored latte with some extra pork sauce and a hunk of pork meat on top as a garnish. While that sounds like something some stoner kid would come up with, it's actually been rolled out to celebrate Lunar New Year. 

I will say, it's nice that Starbucks — at least in one corner of the world — came out with a specialty beverage that isn't embarrassing for a dude to order. Having to get your girlfriend to take a bullet and order you a Unicorn Frappuccino got old.

Nah, just kidding. I'm a Pike Place guy and I take it as black as a Spinal Tap album cover because I'm an adult.

If the thought of a pork latte makes you dry-heave, wait till you see the price tag.

68 yuan. That's what it costs. Just under $10. $9.45 to be exact.

Honestly, just fry up some bacon at home and stir a regular latte with a strip and you're probably in the ballpark for what this tastes like.