Shohei Ohtani Announces He's Married To Mystery Woman From Japan

In a shocking post that has rocked the Dodgers fans within the OutKick news department, Shohei Ohtani broke ultra-secret news Thursday morning that he's now married to "someone" from Japan. 

The 29-year-old flamethrower/dong blaster who recently signed a 10-year, $700 million deal with the Dodgers, isn't revealing who the lucky lady is. 

"Not only have I began a new chapter in my career with the Dodgers but I also have began a new life with someone from my Native country of Japan who is very special to me and I wanted everyone to know I am now married," Shohei wrote on Instagram. 

According to the Associated Press, which translated the Instagram post, Ohtani will "reveal more in an interview," while reminding gossip hounds it's not in their interest to be "conducting unauthorized interviews."

He added: "We hope the two of us — and one animal — will work together."

The news broke in the middle of the night here in the U.S., but it was late afternoon when Japan was rocked by news that Shohei is off the market. 

Now for the obvious American angle to this story: Did Shohei have her signa  prenup?

Guys, this is a ton of money and we see what just happened to Tom Brady and Gisele. Yes, Gisele has more money than Brady, but what we learn is that these marriages aren't exactly safe. The last thing I want to see is Shohei get taken to the cleaners by a Japanese bride with bad intentions. 

This guy is the most incredible baseball player we've ever seen with our eyes and his brain could be scrambled in seconds if this Japanese bride decides she's ready to cash in. This is a real delicate situation we're dealing with. 

(Reddit says prenups aren't common in Japan. "They aren't really a thing," one Redditor said. / Reddit)

In a post that's now two-year-old, a Redditor asked about prenups in Japan. 

"Do people that are getting married in Japan do prenups (prenuptial agreements)? If so, anything in particular for Japan that I should think about? Any recommendations for English-speaking law agencies that do this in Tokyo?" the person wondered. 

It didn't take long for the experts to roll in. 

"They aren't really a thing, but you could simply hold your marriage hostage and refuse to divorce until they give you what they want. If you file a 離婚届不受理申出, the other person is trapped until the document is rescinded," a Japanese marriage expert wrote.

"And once you do go through with it, both parties can add certain conditions through a general contract. That's how child support is handled, for example. Otherwise, the parent without custody can simply disappear into the night."

But there is hope at the end of the tunnel. 

Another expert writes: "Prenups exist in Japan and have for quite a while. Most lawyers can make one. However, they are mostly used by pro sports stars, the very wealthy .000001%, and musicians, actors, and actresses." 

Now we wait to find out who this lucky woman is who just married into a fortune and gets to live the life with the greatest baseball player, possibly ever, that so many other women dreamt about.