Saban's Daughter Invades 'Bama, Karoline Leavitt Manhandles A Lefty Reporter With 3 Words & Drunk Vols Girl!

Here we are, boys and girls. Crunch time here in October. We’ve reached the 20s. That means this is the final full week of the month. Halloween is right around the corner. Football is heating up. The #content is heating up. 

Sure, I’m a miserable Dolphins fan and my team just got stuffed in a locker by the worst team in football, which makes us the worst team in football. So that’s a bummer. The good news is, we’re sticking with our loser coach who dresses like a confused high schooler on the sidelines every game. 

But that’s not a you problem. It’s a me problem. Let’s get this show on the road, because we have a lot to go over today. 

Welcome to a Monday Nightcaps – the one where Kristen Saban returns to Tuscaloosa with a BANG, while one Vols fan throws an all-time tantrum along the way. 

What else? I’ve got a LOADED weekend of #content to dump out, the Libs had a huge weekend protesting Trump, and we’ve got Game 7 playoff baseball tonight. Winner gets a shot at the Dodgers, who could NOT be less interested to going back to the World Series. You’ll see. 

Grab you some chicken and waffles with Tiffani Amber Thiessen to celebrate National Chicken And Waffles Day, and settle in for a Monday ‘Cap!

Tiff Ann enjoys some waffles & I'd like to drown myself in syrup after yesterday 

LOVE me some chicken & waffles. Elite combo. Normally I like to push back against the hip trends, but even I have lines I won’t cross. 

Plus, Tiff Ann is clearly into ‘em, and that’s good enough for me. Nothing like a hotel waffle, either. The best. You give me a solid hotel waffle in the morning, and I think I could conquer just about anything, including this stupid Amazon outage that’s forcing me to teach this entire class in Google Doc like it’s 2015 again. 

What a day. What a start to the week. 

Anyway, good to see Tiff Ann get us started strong. I needed it after yesterday. Joe brought up a great point this morning on Twitter. 

Any coach who dresses like this should be fired on the spot. I am DONE with this stupid look. Pull your pants all the way down and start focusing more on not losing to the 1-5 Browns, Mike. 

This look HAS to go:

What a WEEKEND of #content!

Could you imagine Mike Vrabel dressing like that? Or Andy Reid? Parcells? Saban? Belichick (before JordOn chopped his nuts off, of course)? Of course not. Come on. 

The Dolphins are a disgrace. I can’t believe Mike McDaniel still has a job today. I can’t believe Tua is still the QB. This is the most miserable I’ve been watching this poverty franchise in nearly two decades, and they MIGHT already be more insufferable than the 1-15 team from 2007. 

For the record, I wanted Jaxson Dart and Mike Vrabel last offseason. I’m stuck with the two biggest simps in the NFL instead. I don’t want to hear one word from miserable Giants fans today. You all are fine. You’re set.

Pain. 

OK, enough of me bitching (again). Let’s get the #content train rolling from a big weekend of protesting! 

Take us away, Cory & Adam!

Kristen Saban checks back in, Vols fan puts up a fight & Karoline Leavitt is the best

What a WEEKEND! Not the best start to the week, but a solid weekend and that’s all that matters around here. Couple thoughts …

1. Imagine spending your Saturday protesting Donald Trump with a bunch of old, white, angry boomers, instead of watching college football? I could smell the protest from my house. Just old, crusty, bitter 70-year-olds who smell like moth balls and probably still put bars of soap under the bedsheets. 

And if you at all understand that reference, you automatically win today's class. Kudos to you. That's big league stuff. 

2. Cory Booker and Adam Schiff are maybe the two biggest weirdos on the planet. Store-brand Obama and Watermelon Head! THOSE dudes are the alphas on the left right now. We will never, ever lose again. 

3. I assume Florida will go after Lane, but I don't see him leaving Oxford. Why would he? Ole Miss is a national title contender every year, and recruiting doesn't matter anymore. If Ole Miss has the same NIL money as UF does, why in the world would Lane leave? If I'm Florida, I'm going after Gruden. Or DaeSean Hamilton!

He'd be PERFECT in Gainesville! 

OK, let’s rapid-fire this penultimate Monday of October class into a big night of NFL doubleheader action …

That’s right – we have two games tonight, one of which starts at 10 p.m. (!!!). What a time to be alive. Between that and Mariners-Jays Game 7, I think we could be in for an all-time night. 

Also, what a night for Seattle! Could either be the best night ever, or the most miserable night in the history of time. Nothing better than Game 7 October baseball. And look who awaits the winner!

My God. Amazing. And by the way, our unofficial Dodgers beat writer, Ian Miller (the same one who HATES the SEC) told us all season that LA was awful, and they’d never make it back. OK, Ian. Sure thing!

Going back to the World Series is just expected at this point if you're the Dodgers. That's what happens when you have the greatest player ever, along with about four other superstars in both the lineup and rotation. 

I'm not hating, by the way. OK, maybe a little, but I respect the non-celebration. Act like you've been there before, especially when … you've been there before. 

It's all semantics at this point, clearly. Just add the NLCS and World Series to LA's schedule from now on. Why stop at 162, Manfred? Go ahead and pencil them in for an NLCS every year, at minimum. 

Couple more quickies (hey now!) on the way out. Before we finish in Tuscaloosa, let’s check on our great press secretary on this beautiful Monday:

Incredible. "Your mom" is, and always has been, such a solid comeback. No matter the situation, it ALWAYS works. Whether you’re in 5th grade PE picking a fight with a bunch of snot-nosed kids, or the United States Press Sec, it just works. There’s never a bad time for it. 

God, the Libs must HATE Karoline Leavitt. She’s always 14 steps ahead of them. It’s such a mismatch, every single time. 

And what a stupid question, right? This is why the media is just insufferable. #MyPressSec!

Finally, let’s head on out to Tuscaloosa and check in on Vols fans after a blowout loss Saturday night!

That’s the good stuff, boys and girls. College football at its finest. That’s what it’s all about. This chick put up a good fight. Credit where it’s due. That’s someone’s daughter, and, probably, someone’s mom. 

What a country. What a sport. 

The good news is, Kristen Saban was ALSO in town this weekend, and she represented Alabama much better. 

Take us into the week, Kristen!

OutKick Nightcaps is a daily column set to run Monday through Friday at 4 p.m. (roughly, we’re not robots).

Who does UF hire? Email me at Zach.Dean@OutKick.com.