Putin, North Korea Official Exchange Hall Of Fame-Worthy Awkward Handshake

Few things get my blood pumping like a good ol' fashion awkward handshake, and we just got a dozy on the other side of the planet, and it comes from Russian President Vladimir Putin and North Korean Foreign Minister Choe Son Hui.

I'm not sure why I love a brutally awkward handshake. I just enjoy watching when simple pleasantries attack.

But first, let's set the stage. According to The Independent, Putin was meeting with Choe — one of North Korea's top diplomatic officials — on Russia's National Unity Day holiday which took place on Monday, and it comes after the North Koreans sent thousands of soldiers to assist Russia in the ongoing war in Ukraine.

So, that's why Choe was in town, and Putin decided to greet her with a marathon minute-plus handshake.

That's just excruciating. 

I'm sure both of their hands were clamming up while Putin just blasted the smell of the borscht he had for lunch into her face like Godzilla's atomic breath.

Some see this as a power play from Putin, but I don't think that's necessarily what happened here. Sure, you can use a handshake as a power move, but I feel like there's a ceiling with that.

You go in firm, and you don't let go all you want, but you can't do that for more than like 20 seconds before it starts going from a power move to a psycho move.

I broke this thing down like one of Old Man Zapruder's home movies — one of those movies in particular — and I couldn't believe the lack of actual shake-like movement after the initial shake.

If you're going to go long, you've got to do the occasional shake to keep the proverbial balloon in the air. Otherwise, you're just holding hands.

If I've said it once, I've said it a thousand times: I want my handshakes crisp and clean. 

That shake between Putin and Choe was about as crisp as a head of lettuce that got pushed to the back of your fridge.