Paige Spiranac's Top Opponent Claire Hogle Respects Summer, Dabo Is Getting Run Out Of Town & Tom Brady Actually Uses Hertz
The war on summer (and men) is growing
This is exactly what I want to see out of you guys. I want heads on swivels. I want tipped off on what you're seeing in your part of the world. I want to know the vibes you're getting from society. I want intel. I'm in the intel business. Other websites believe in telling you everything you need to know.
When they zig, I zag. It's gotten me this far. Today, one of the Screencaps veterans (not a military vet that I know of, just a veteran of many Screencaps colums) sends intel.
• Wyn in Colorado writes:
We’ve got an issue. As a veteran of SCs I’m always on the lookout for those trying to ruin the lives of guys just trying to enjoy the end of summer before Mother Nature moves on.
Tonight , while browsing my favorite site (thisiswhyimbroke.com) for impulse purchases and blowing money, I came across a listing for “Dumpkin Spice Dude Wipes”. Now, I’m not one to wipe with what is essentially a baby wipe marketed to men but to each their own.
That said, Dude Wipes is trying to have guys start wiping with a scent of Fall well before the September 23rd seasonal change. Even still, grown men shouldn’t be wiping with a towel scented like their wife’s favorite drink from Fivebucks (real coffee shop name omitted because they aren’t a sponsor).
Please, fellow guys of Screencaps Nation, take a pass on these and consider enjoying the last 18 days of Summer.
Kinsey:
Please tell me none of you are wiping your asses with pumpkin spice latte wipes. I'll tell you right now, if I catch a whiff of pumpkin spice from Millennial Chris B. in Bowling Green on the golf course this fall (after he completes like three Ironmans that he's had to train for causing him to skip golf yesterday...I might throw out my back...I can't risk it so close to the race...blah, blah, blah) I'm never golfing with that guy ever again.
Now here's someone who RESPECTS summer
• Dana B. is a great Screencaps reader and knows exactly what I'm looking for out of a county fair, of which there are many in Ohio:
For the 45th year, Bowman's Texas Tenderloins is at the Van Wert County Fair. And for the 45th year, they were PERFECT!!
A bucket of Fiske French Fries and a Lemon Shake-up....Heaven!!!
Midwesterners know!!
The Deion Sanders Experience
• Bill H. writes:
We all know that Deion Sanders is about promotion.
The most interesting thing about the immediate post-game field interview was not his short camera time to the W, but there were no last year's Buff players interviewed, only 2 former Jackson State players, Travis Hunter and Shedeur Sanders. While worthy of the attention, they spoke longer than Prime and started pumping the doubters.
I think I am like most casual football fans towards the new CU in that we are waiters, not haters. Let's see if this thing keeps rolling or eventually gets real like LSU Sunday night.
"Everyone has a plan until they get punched in the face".
The Buffs have been down so long, it is nice to finally see some positive movement. For that matter, the same could go for the Huskers. Hope to see another tight game.
Kinsey:
I have to say, I wasn't expecting that type of email out of Bill H. Did I just learn that Bill H. is a Colorado fan? Didn't know that.
Look, Deion Sanders, 56, is GREAT for college football. Enjoy it while you can because Deion's heading towards the NFL. You'll be lucky to get two more years of this at Colorado before 80-year-old Jerry Jones has no choice but to bring Prime to Dallas to win that elusive 21st century Super Bowl or die trying.
Shedeur Sanders is 21; his brother Shilo is 23!
The Deion kids aren't long for Colorado which tells me Deion (five year, $29.5 million contract) will go balls to the walls this year and probably next if Shedeur has a shot at the Heisman (this plot could get blown up if he goes and wins it this year).
Deion's strategy is written on the wall.
Play the "We comin!" angle, pivot to the "We here" strategy, which leads to the "We keepin recepits" talk, to the "Nobody believed in us," then the "Media hates us" angle which will lead to the "Us against the world" strategy all the while with a tinge of race (which you clearly noticed in his comments this weekend) thrown in as a wink wink to the 'hood which is clearly aimed at black kids who might be considering playing for Saban, Kirby, Harbaugh, Ryan Day, etc.
This is like watching a running storyline from WWE and I don't even watch WWE. It's a masterclass.
Remember: You shouldn't get too emotional over what Deion says during press conferences, to the sideline reporters in postgame interviews or on the Gameday shows.
It's all calculated theater and aimed at eventually funneling cash and power to Deion's pocket as a huge f-you to white people who've controlled football and college presidents who have profited off college football.
Just let this play out. It's must-see TV and should make for a great documentary that Deion will sell to Netflix or the highest bidder.
That's business 101 in 2023. Deion's gettin' his.
More Deion observations (I gave up capitalizing words in Dave's email...I'd be here all day editing these emails, just go with it)
• Dave M. in Woodland Hills, CA writes:
Hey joe,
Interesting weekend of college football. wyoming and colorado do a rocky mountain 2-step on a pair of texas teams, fsu flexes, the pac-12 swan song starts undefeated, and tar heels own the other carolina/usc...
I've been a colorado buff fan since i was 10. the cu buff was the first tattoo i got (back when a tattoo meant something), i went to grad school there, and had season tickets back in the 90s/00s. i've endured way more downs than ups, but the ups are some of the highest sports ups of my life.
so to see deion do what deion does brought a huge smile to my face on saturday. i was and am a big fan of this hire. sanders has never played on a team i support, but i was always a fan because he walked his talk. i respect that. and he's a smart motherf--ker.
let's not misdiagnose deion's calling out of his detractors by saying, and i paraphrase, "a bold, confident black man backing up his talk makes people uncomfortable".
i give deion a pass on his comments - he's got a point. and here's why: the "people" he's referring to are big Js, especially the emasculated big Sports Js. they're the ones sanders says he has "receipts" of.
and guess what most of those big (Sports) Js are? woke, white, self-loathing male bitches.
and what are woke, white self-loathing chads (and karens)? and the rest of the democrats they proudly consider themselves? known racists - proven again and again.
of course, that shrill asshat queen of the inaugural woke all-star challenge
is too dumb and too consumed to notice the elephant in the room in yet another one of her *yawn* deeply-thought-out takes: the "coded" language is written by fellow loser woke Big Js like her.
the irony writes itself.
and you already see it in the past 24 hours: the same woke, white, doughy, libtard Big (Sports) Js are now on the bandwagon. you know it's bad when things like "deion's got the 3 best players in the country on his team" or "you need to take the buffs seriously" are being thrown around.
as a buffs fan/alum, i obviously hope this continues - wish i were in boulder for NU this week. i've been at folsom for NU games, back when half the stadium would be filled with red, and it's always electric. whether it's a curbstomp or last-second win, nothing beats beating the shuckers in football.
Kinsey:
Of course Colorado grads are jacked up. I'd hope so! Suddenly college football east of the Mississippi is relevant to the national conversation and that's GREAT news for this country.
Dave nailed this one: "most of those big (Sports) Js are? woke, white, self-loathing male bitches(.)"
So true, Dave.
And they hate when others find success and make a bunch of f-you money. Nobody roots for the destruction of successful people like Big J self-loathing male bitches.
I'll co-sign that, Dave.
ESPN remains mediocre
• John from SD writes:
Thank you Duke: this coming from a Buckeyes fan! Who does Debo want his starting quarterback to be now? Klubnik or DJ who he let go and had an outstanding first week?
Glad CFB is back and CBS and FOX are on top of CFB broadcasting while espin remains mediocre.
Have a great four day work week!
Kinsey:
How did that DJ Ulaghativaiaia'ewese guy go to Oregon State and look completely different than he did at Clemson? Sure, the Beavs played San Jose State, but still, DJ was 20 of 25 for 239 and three TDs. I can't remember him ever looking comfortable at Clemson.
• Kevin in Toboso, OH writes:
Gus Johnson brings the heat every game and just gets you juiced. Gus and Joel Klatt make listening to games fun. They actually sound like they enjoy what they're doing. Could Herbstreit or Fowler being anymore boring? Please espn do better…. wait sorry I forgot its espn.
Kinsey:
I don't know what Fowler's problem is, but the guy constantly feels like he'd rather be anywhere but in the college football stadium having a great time. Maybe he'd rather be at his beloved U.S. Open. The guy just seems miserable. Does anyone here have a personal Chris Fowler story to share? The guy needs to cheer up and make sure the kicks go through the posts.
The OutKick expansion continues
I'm sitting down for a chat with Charly after this edition of Screencaps to take the pulse of how she's feeling about this new show and what you guys can expect from OutKick the Morning.
Honestly, I have no advanced intel on the format of the show, how long the show runs, the segments you guys can expect, etc. I'm going into this one blind, so we're going to learn together.
Get your asses back to work
How do I know the summer travel season is over? This was the first story I saw this morning on Fox Business. Back to the grind, folks. Congrats to those of you who already have that big pile of Deion f-you money.
You won't find Screencaps trying to tear you down for securing the bag.
