M&Ms Solves Sexism With Laughably Woke 'All-Female' Packs

Rest easy, everyone. M&Ms are here to save the day and fight sexism with some all-female packs of candy.

Mars, the iconic candy brand's parent company, has unveiled new packs that only feature purple, green, and brown M&Ms.

No this isn't the result of a Van Halen tour rider, it's because those are the female M&Ms.

Remember? They all have personalities. The red one is the leader, the yellow one is dumb, and they made the green one a sexpot.

The Green and Brown M&Ms have been around for years, and a few months back, the company released a purple peanut M&M which is a "plus-size" female, because why wouldn't it be?

On the packs the characters are also printed upside down, to honor women who "flip the status quo."

M&Ms Are Going All In On Wokeness

Mars is just another company going guns-blazing into woke culture in the name of catching a bit of progressive clout along the way.

However, this isn't the first time M&Ms has gone this route. Back in 2015, the company released an image of the Green and Brown M&Ms sitting on the beach together and holding hands.

Some saw this as an implication that the two M&Ms were lesbians.

If you're having trouble keeping up with the personalities and sexual proclivities of fictitious candy characters, me too.

"There is so much about our new spokescandy that people can relate to and appreciate, including her willingness to embrace her true self - our new character reminds us to celebrate what makes us unique," Jane Hwang, global VP at Mars Wrigley said.

If you need your self-identity validated by candy then there are deeper issues at play.

Does it hurt anyone? No.

Does it help anyone? Also no.

Until people stop eating this kind of thing up — both literally and figuratively — this performative posturing is going to keep happening.

Follow on Twitter: @Matt_Reigle