'MLB's Hottest Host' Is Back For The Season, Brooks Nader Is An SI Legend & NFL Quarterbacks As High Schoolers
I know, I know – it's March Madness time. I get it. Tomorrow is Thursday, which means the Sweet 16 tips off. And then the Elite 8.
I get it. I promise, I do.
But I don't care. Don't give a you-know-what.
(Yes, I know I usually just go ahead and use the word, but it's too early to be using that kind of language. We have class.)
It's MLB Opening Day eve, boys and girls. Take your basketballs and hockey pucks and spring footballs (hey, welcome back UFL!), and stuff them all inside a closet, because we don't need 'em anymore.
Baseball is BACK beginning tomorrow afternoon. And with that, comes, in my opinion, the most underrated studio host in the game today – Lauren Shehadi.
On that note, welcome to a Wednesday Nightcaps – the one where we give MLB Network Lauren the respect she deserves as she plants herself back in our living rooms for the next six months.
What else do y'all wanna talk about today? Sean Payton giving maybe the most hilarious response possible to a Russell Wilson question? Absolutely. That's right in our wheelhouse.
Sports Illustrated legend Brooks Nader officially becoming a legend? Duh.
We've also got all 32 starting NFL QBs as high schoolers, and Joe is under absolute ATTACK right now from the Caitlin Clark internet wagon, so I guess it's time for Nightcaps to step in and offer a verdict.
We're nothing if not fair around here, you know.
Grab yourself whatever fruity hump day drink you'd like and settle in for a Wednesday class!
Welcome back Major League Baseball with MLB Network's Lauren Shehadi
We're gonna start today on the diamond, because it's been far too long until the Red Sox pissed me off.
Tomorrow, they start again! (Although they don't play until 10:05 like a bunch of idiots, so I'm already annoyed. Strike 1!)
The 2024 MLB season returns with a full slate of beautiful games beginning tomorrow afternoon, meaning I'm about to blow all the money I made on random NHL parlays last weekend in one fell swoop.
Can't think of a better way to spend a Thursday, frankly.
Anyway, opening day used to be the best when I lived in Boston. Literally was a national holiday up there. You just felt it in the air.
And if you got really lucky, and it was one of those rare 70-degree springtime days in late March, it was an absolute party from sun-up to sundown.
PS: I can STILL remember watching 2002 opening day from a school computer on the old MLB Gameday app. Electric:
Back then it was just that little baseball field on the bottom left. That was it. And it was awesome.
Anyway, while the Sox will be just horrible this year – thanks, woke John Henry! – I'm still pumped to be able to sit on my back porch every night, throw in some stupid NRFIs (look it up if you don't know), and drown the night away. It's the best.
Starting my mornings for the next six months with the MLB Central crew ain't a bad thing, either.
And while I think Mark DeRosa is the best studio guy in all of sports right now, the real reason anyone shows up is Lauren Shehadi.
Welcome back!
Sean Payton hated Russell Wilson
Hey! Nightcaps OG Kelly Nash makes an MLB-eve cameo, too! What a party. What a time to be alive.
Can't wait. Batter up.
Now, back to the NFL, which seemingly never has an actual quiet part of the offseason.
This week, the league spun the wheel and landed on the annual meetings, which brings all the coaches together and allows them to be hounded by the media at 7 a.m. during their breakfast.
If it sounds like an awful way to start the day, it is! Now, add in a pre-coffee Russell Wilson question, and it's downright miserable:
Speaking of Mr. Unlimited, here he is … as a teenager!
Sean couldn't have said no any quicker if he had tried. Just not possible. Scientifically, it's not possible to answer a question any faster.
Guy HATED being with Russ for the eight months they were together. Can't imagine why!
My God. Just the worst.
Anyway, here's Russ from his high school days, along with all the other starters in the NFL right now.
Don't know why this video was made in the first place, but I couldn't stop watching this morning:
Weighing in on the Caitlin Clark drama and Crazy Plane Lady stop by
Couple quick, and obvious, takeaways here …
- Joe Burrow frosted tips?
- Aiden O'Connell is still considered a starter in the league? Seriously?
- Clemson did WONDERS for Trevor Lawrence.
- CJ Stroud is the exact same.
- Aaron Rodgers in high school was PEAK 1990s horror movie high school kid. He'd fit perfectly in the Scream series.
- Sam Darnold is literally the exact same.
- Jordan Love, on the other hand, is not.
- Caleb Williams regular finger nails!
- Brock Purdy: see Sam Darnold.
- Matty Stafford was clearly too talented to need the gym, which I respect the hell out of.
- Pre-swag Baker Mayfield.
- Kirk Cousins is the most shocking thing I've ever seen.
- lol Jake Fromm? See Aiden O'Connell.
What a wild little two minutes, huh? Well done, internet.
Rapid-fire time!
First up? Today is National Joe Day. True story. Hand to God. To celebrate, the internet mob gathered their virtual pitchforks and stormed the Beaches of Kinsey over his Caitlin Clark take yesterday:
Nearly 300 responses! And that's not even counting the other internet blogs who attacked Joe just so they could get Caitlin's name in the headline for the #clicks.
Ain't my first rodeo, fellas. I get it, but I also see right through it.
Anyway, where do the loose cannon Nightcaps students stand on this one? Has the Caitlin Clark shtick run its course? Is Joe just being a hater?
I'm not sure the Caitlin Clark thing has run its course. I think America does, however, get tired of things a little quicker nowadays.
We don't have the patience we used to – and we've never been particularly patient to begin with – so when things get constantly stuffed down our gullet, we tend to eventually get annoyed.
And when that happens, this sort of thing starts to happen. A lot.
I think we've all got Caitlin Clark fatigue right now, personally. I also think Joe's the best in business at getting out ahead of trends, so he's probably A) right on this, or B) going to eventually be proven right in the future.
I think you can sort of compare it to Patrick Mahomes in the NFL. I used to LOVE Mahomes. We all did. But this past season, all he did was bitch and moan every single time a play didn't go his way. Go back and watch. It's brutal.
We all loved Tony Romo. But then he got too big for his own britches and started blabbering in the booth. Now, we hate him.
Look at Tom Brady. Look at Tiger Woods. Loved ‘em, then hated ’em, now we love 'em again.
It's all cyclical. The average American sports fan is extremely cyclical. Right now, the cycle might be turning south for Caitlin Clark.
Doesn't mean it'll stay that way. Hell, it definitely won't. But Joe was just pointing out that the tides are starting to shift, which is very on brand for Americans.
How's THAT for an educated answer? See, it's not all just hot TV hosts and insufferable quarterbacks around here. We do have substance every once in a while.
That being said, here's Crazy Plane Lady Tiffany Gomas fielding some lucrative offers by all the horny fellas on Elon's Twitter:
Sports Illustrated legend Brooks Nader takes us into a hump day night
Nobody has turned her life around more in the past year than Tiffany Gomas.
Seems like just yesterday she was going viral for being an absolute lunatic on a flight, and now she's a social media star attracting every weirdo from Florida to California.
The American Dream.
She still has a ways to go to catch Brooks Nader, though. Brooks, for those who missed it, was recently named a legend by Sports Illustrated. No clue what that means, but I can't argue the logic.
See you tomorrow.
OutKick Nightcaps is a daily column set to run Monday through Friday at 4 p.m. (roughly, we’re not robots).
Does Joe deserve all the hate on National Joe Day? Email me at Zach.Dean@OutKick.com.