Kourtney Kardashian’s Perky Chest Workout Instruction Video Is Going Viral
As a site that was founded on Clay Travis' full support of the First Amendment and boobs, it's our duty to tell all the ladies out there about the new "Perky T--ty Workout" craze from Kourtney Kardashian that is going to be sweeping through the suburbs this winter.
You can believe that the Kardashians are dumb all you want, but you have to give these women credit for knowing how to tap into the suburban mom cash pipeline. Kourtney owns a wellness site, Poosh, where instructors walk women through all sorts of workouts, including this one where, if they follow instructions, they can come out of winter with a rack that appears bigger, perkier and ready to turn heads on that Riveria Maya trip.
Do you want your girlfriends to stop and admire your rack on that Mexican vacation while they're stuck in those mom one-pieces because they've been suckin' down draft beers all winter? It's time to put in the work like a Kardashian
Ladies, listen up as pilates instructor Shannon Nadj, explains how to change your racks during the offseason.
"Unfortunately, you can’t push yourself up to bigger, perkier boobs. However, you can strengthen your pectoral muscles right behind and around this area,” Shannon explains to viewers.
Yes, Shannon is wearing wrist weights. She claims you don't need to wear them to get perkier and bigger boobs, but DO YOU WANT YOUR BOOBS LOOKING AMAZING IN RIVIERA MAYA OR NOT?
Poosh / YouTube
Get the damn weights.
Let's get working, ladies! Do it for the boobs!
• Open the shoulders and chest
• Keep the core muscles tight
• No slouching!
• Shoulder presses!
• Swim moves
• Rowing motions
• Stretch, stretch, you can do it!
• Inhale, I said stretch those shoulders! Do you want bigger boobs like a Kardashian? Then DOOOO IT!
Boob-toning workouts aren't exactly new to the Internet. It's just that the Kardashian machine is great at putting their names on this stuff and then women think the fountain of boob youth has been turned on full blast and they're going to look amazing on the Lake Norris houseboat.
Give this workout a try ladies, and if it doesn't help, you can do what the rest of Hollywood does and get a boob job or have the doc fire up his battery-powered Shop-vac and suck out a few gallons of fat to get toned like Kourtney or Shannon.