Kimberly Guilfoyle Debuts A New 'Relaxed' Look After Getting Dumped By Don Jr., OSU Wins & Bevo Is So Sad
83-yards straight through the heart of Texas
I'm just glad my kids are old enough now to see Jack Sawyer run like he just robbed a bank and stole the soul of Longhorns fans and the SEC.
They'll never forget last night, especially when, years from now, they're sitting in a Jack Sawyer car dealership littered with this photo on the walls. 20 years from now, I assume it will be a digital screen on the wall of Jack's dealership showing him running for his life across the AT&T turf.
Jack Sawyer scoops and scores the knockout blow to beat Texas in the Cotton Bowl. (Photo by Alex Slitz/Getty Images)
Was it the prettiest game I'd ever witnessed? Hell no.
I sat there in the basement with a couple of buddies thinking the TreVeyon Henderson personal foul would haunt me for years. Did he get punched in the nuts?
Minutes later, Henderson was redeeming himself.
Huge relief.
Then came the pass interferences in the end zones that I figured were a turning point. You could feel Texas gaining the momentum. If they tie the game and Ohio State goes 3-and-out to start the drive with two minutes on the clock, Texas knew they had a shot to set up the game-winning field goal. They had two timeouts and the two-minute warning to work with.
First and goal at the ONE.
Sark has 6-4, 225 Arch Manning ready to go for four sneaks. They'll get at least one of them, right?
Right?
Oh, no.
10 years after Zeke Elliott ran like the wind through the heart of Alabama, Jack Sawyer had his moment. It goes down in history, but now there's one more game to determine if the Sawyer play goes down as one of the most important plays in Ohio State football history.
Go Bucks. Beat Lou Holtz's ass!
Columbus legend Jack Sawyer can go ahead and open a car dealership or go into real estate and make a fortune. Columbus will never forget. (Photo by Ron Jenkins/Getty Images)
Bad Boy Ryan didn't even have to dump out his horse balls on Steve Sarkisian's forehead. (Photo by Ron Jenkins/Getty Images)
Odds & ends
— Credit to Chipper for throwing the ball down the field in spots. Smith had the one ball go through his hands. They took a few shots to keep Texas honest while they were giving up everything short and over the middle.
— Credit to Bad Boy Ryan for not having a moment that will haunt me for life. That was a relief in a heartburn game.
— I want Bad Boy Ryan full of focus and rage over the next week. I want him reminding the Buckeyes that God is on Notre Dame's side. Show them that field goal where the ball magically cuts back to the left to win the Orange Bowl. That was clearly an intervention.
SHOOT it into their veins that ESPN LOVES Marcus Freeman and Kirk Herbstreit can't stop talking about Freeman being more fashionable than Day.
It's time to bury the echoes. Bury Lou Holtz's ass.
One more.
— John from SD says:
I know you’ll address Ryan Day’s balls first.
Was the O play calling questionable after the first drive? Of course!
Did UT double JJ Smith all game to prevent a big game by him? Yes.
Too many offensive penalties ending drives by the Buckeyes? Of course.
OSU D played their ass off again!
Go Buckeyes! Beat the Irish.
— Chris Y. who famously took a shot at David in Illinois' breakfast burrito, wrote:
Sark is going to take out the buckeyes only weapon, the QB is gonna Kansas State and Arch is going to run for 2 TD's. When it's all said and done, the drum major will not be the only one bending over backwards.
Texas 69
A Ohio State University 2
— Chris Y. later wrote:
Good game.
Too bad Texas pissed down their leg. Sawyer will have a long NFL career. Howard is a Dollar Tree Tim Tebow.
I can see the promo now: "Will Howard! Riley Leonard! presented by Sominex"
The final is Clubber Lang vs Ivan Drago. Whoever wins, America loses. But hey, at least it's not Tennessee. IYKYK and IKYK.
Oh well. We're on to basketball season.
— Millennial Jeff in Minnesota IS BACK after a layoff:
How about them Bison!
NDSU just one hour 10th national championship in the FCS out of 14 years.
Division 2 and Division 3 football national championships we're also won by Midwest schools.
Second year in a row that the SEC has not won a national championship. The south is only good at kissing ass to ESPN and committing penalties.
Sawyer has the strip sack to win the game. Congratulations to him! As a former defensive end, and the son of a defenseman, and likely the father to four defensive ends. That is a dream!
F' the overrated SEC. They can no longer survive on hype, and ESPN propping me up and them up.
Herbstreit is an SEC partisan hack. A traitor to Columbus.
— Texas Tech fan Charles K., the reigning Two-Club Invitational champion, checks in:
Osu to the natty!!!
Kinsey:
He had to love watching Texas lose.
— David in Illinois claims this is his "final contribution":
I want to congratulate YOUR Ohio State Buckeyes on carving a path thru the three toughest opponents in the CFP to land in the national championship game. Fowler and Herbie fanboying for Texas was cringe, so nothing was more satisfying than a scoop and score to ice the game after two pass interference calls had UT 1st and Goal from the 1 yard line.
As the #8 seed, you rolled #9 Tennessee, #1 Oregon and #5 Texas. That’s two of the "best" three SEC teams this season, plus the only unbeaten team during the regular season.
The B1G is now 5-1 vs. the SEC in bowl games this year, including my Illini in perhaps one the most entertaining outings: the Shane Beamer Pampers Bowl. Even stacking bowls with games like 8-4 A&M v. 6-6 USC and 9-3 Alabama v. 7-5 Michigan couldn’t keep the SEC from being exposed. It apparently just means less.
Reece Davis couldn’t help himself at the start of the trophy presentation from saying the night "mostly" belongs to Ohio State. Really Reece? Who does that remaining sliver belong to? Seeds 5-8 beat seeds 9-12, then seeds 1-4. Can’t wait for the honks to start analyzing how the seeding needs to change next season so "the fans" aren’t "stuck with" a #7 v. #8 finals.
Go Buckeyes to win it all!
Kinsey:
I don't know where David is going. Final contribution? Why?
The Ts have moved once again like they're on the run from the Feds
— Mike T. says they're now in Cordoba, Spain:
The regional beer here is Victoria, brewed in Malaga, Spain.
Delicious and an unbelievably beautiful City!
Local dark beer Alhambra Reserva
The Mikayla Demaiter AI truthers just refuse to believe me
— Rod writes:
I’m convinced she’s AI. Not because of her looks but because I am yet to see a candid pic of her or any hockey highlights of her. She supposedly played pro hockey? What league and what team? Where’s the news coverage about her career? How about some actual video of her beyond 2-3 second snippets in very AI friendly settings? Is there a live action interview or podcast with her as a guest anywhere on any social media post? I am yet to see one. She’s the Sidd Finch of this generation.
Kinsey:
Rod, I PROMISE she's real. I don't have time this morning to dig up her old content, but I have been writing about her going back to when she was just leaving junior hockey in Canada. She was dating a pro hockey player. I'm not sure they're still together, but I PROMISE she's real.
###############
And with that, I have to run. There's snow to shovel and rec basketball to watch. AND the NFL playoffs. Can the Ravens and Steelers tie and both get kicked out of the playoffs?
Let's have a great weekend.
Email: joekinsey@gmail.com