Kate Upton Lifts Morale After Edwin Diaz Injury, Kingsbury's Girlfriend Models Pants, Ghosts In Arizona, David Blaine Accident

PublishedMarch 16, 2023 10:02 PM EDT|UpdatedMarch 16, 2023 10:02 PM EDT

What a wonderful day for sports. Seriously, we've just started what I believe are among the greatest four days on the sporting calendar each year - and I'm not even a basketball fan! And yes, I know Mets fans are in shambles today, but hey ... even if you don't like March Madness, Kate Upton is here to cheer you up!

We'll check in with Queen Kate in a bit as we await further updates on Edwin Diaz and settle in for this Princeton-Arizona showdown. And hey, it's not even on TruTV, so I know you all can find it!

What else do I have in store for you today as you quickly skim this during the commercials? Let's see, Kliff Kingsbury's Instagram model girlfriend, Veronica Bielik, filled out a pair of pants quite nicely. That catch your fancy?

How about a paranormal sighting on an Arizona highway? Float your boat at all? Stupid doctors coming after your sandwiches? David Blaine nearly accidentally killing himself? No? Fine!

I'll start, then, by defending the World Baseball from all your lunatic Mets fans out there today who are out for blood, and then I'll try to reel you back in with some Kate Upton appreciation. Sound like a plan?

OK, good. Break!

Edwin Diaz may be out for the year and Mets fans are angry. (Photo by Eric Espada/Getty Images)

Edwin Diaz injury is on the Mets, not the World Baseball Classic

Yep, I said it. Needed to be said, and clearly I'm the only one who has the balls to do so.

Side note: earlier today I also defended Dan Orlovsky never washing his towel, and I'm quite sure I was on an island there, too. Whatever. Someone has to have some guts in this world.

Anyway, back to Edwin Diaz, who certainly looked to have suffered a major knee injury celebrating Puerto Rico's huge win over the DR Wednesday night. It was a tough look all around. You know it's bad when the other team who's just been eliminated hasn't left the field yet, either.

Yeah, not great. Barring a miracle, Diaz is probably out for a while - and that's putting it lightly.

Predictably, Mets Twitter - which is already an unstable place - has gone off the rails today. It's chaos out there in the streets. People don't just want the WBC canceled, they want it to quite literally burn in hell.

But it ain't the WBC's fault. Sorry, but it isn't. You know who's fault this is? The New York Mets. Guess what? Edwin Diaz works for the Mets, and if the Mets say 'don't play,' Diaz ain't playing.

It's the classic Michael Scott-Ryan Howard scene from The Office where Michael gets caught having a second job with Vikram, who, by the way, is underrated as hell on that show. Great character and he gave us one of the funniest lines of the show:

And yes, I did video that with my phone off my camera. Whatever. As Michael Scott would say, sue me, Peacock. I pay for your stupid services every month, so deal with it.

Anyway, the OG point here is don't blame the World Baseball Classic for Edwin Diaz shredding his knee. He chose to play, the Mets let him play, and it happened after the game. Enough.

And hey, it's not like the Mets didn't prepare for moments like these ...

Mets fans: Cheer up with Kate Upton

I know that was tough to watch, Mets fans. I am sorry. I'm a Red Sox fan and we're gonna stink this year, so I'm pretty numb to it at this point.

If it makes you feel any better, Chris Sale will almost assuredly get hurt after one start.

Anyway, here's Justin Verlander's wife, Kate Upton, to help lift morale on an otherwise tough day. It's the least we could do.

And hey, happy early Amazin Day!

TikTok Truckers see ghost in Arizona

Thanks for the break, Kate. You were always one of the real ones.

OK, back to reality. Well, not really!

Anyone see these truckers out in Arizona who claim to have encountered a ghost on the highway? I've watched it a dozen times and can't figure out what it is.

Here's the original caption with the TikTok. If you couldn't tell, it's the raw version.

We are truckers the other night driving at 230 am in the arizona desert on S.R. 87 i seen someone or something standing in the road not a car anywhere to be found you tell me what you think it is #ghosts#fyp#paramormal#skinwalker#creepy#unexplained

If you stop it perfect at six seconds, it almost looks like half a body? I don't know. I love scary things, but I'm also terrified of ghosts. Huge fan of the CBS show, not a huge fan of the actual thing.

Paranormal Activity scared the bejesus out of me as a kid. Don't know if I've fully recovered. Probably never will.

Fine. Mount Rushmore of scary movies. You've convinced me!

Honorable mentions include Saw II, Rob Zombie's Halloween remake, Halloween 6 with Paul Rudd, and Scream 2. Yeah, clearly I have a type.

Also, if you're looking for just an awful scary movie to watch that's so bad you have to keep watching just to see how it ends, check out The Resort on Hulu. The last 20 minutes are amazing.

Woke police are trying to steal our sandwiches

Speaking of folding up dead meat (come on, that was pretty good) ...

The No Fun Woke Police (professors) are trying to steal one of our great American freedoms: the sandwich.

From the story:

“The standard deli sandwich with processed meat and cheese, you’re literally eating a heart bomb,” says Dariush Mozaffarian, a cardiologist and professor of nutrition and medicine at Tufts University.

Sandwiches’ size—and their calorie content—have ballooned, too. A typical turkey sandwich in the 1980s contained about 320 calories, according to a report from the National Heart, Lung and Blood Institute. Twenty years later, a turkey sandwich contained about 820 calories.

Hey, Dariush, shut up. How about that for a heart bomb? I don't even know what that means, but it sounded good in my head. And you know what tastes better today than it did 20 years ago?

The damn turkey sandwich I just ate for lunch. That's what. Bigger is better, folks. That's just the way it is. Our wives can tell us whatever they want, but we know.

And how about this line?

The problem with sandwiches starts with the bread, researchers say. The classic white bread, submarine bun or French baguette is mostly carbohydrates in the form of highly processed white flour.

“It turns into sugar as soon as it hits your tongue,” says Eric Rimm, professor of epidemiology and nutrition at the Harvard T.H. Chan School of Public Health.

That sounds awesome. Sign me up for that bread every day and twice on Sundays.

More meat, more processed cheese, more bread. More, more, more! As Doug Heffernan once said, I prefer to die happy.

David Blaine crashes, so does this Fiat 500

Couple close calls at the buzzer to take us home on this March Madness Thursday.

Let's start with everyone's favorite magician not named Criss Angel, David Blaine, who decided it would be a good idea to plunge into a giant pile of boxes from 80-feet in the sky.

It did NOT go well.

Well, the crowd noise sort of says it all, doesn't it? Just a thump, followed by a collective concerned groan.

What a stud, though! David gets right back up, pops that bad boy back in and finishes the show like the consummate professional he is.

You don't have to tell Harrison Ford how tough he is.

While we're on the topic of horrifying crashes, how about the ride this Fiat 500 went on?

Good lord. Obviously, I'm only showing that because everyone survived. Yep. Not a scratch! What a built-in safety commercial Fiat just had land in it's lap!

From The Sun:

Jackson Davis, 20, flipped his car over numerous times and it went several feet in the air after he lost control while trying to avoid a collision with another car.

Both Davis and his passenger, who lost consciousness and woke up as the car was spinning, escaped serious injury.

Davis, who admitted driving without due care and attention, disputed that he had been travelling at speed but accepted that he had lost control of the vehicle.

Yep. DEFINITELY lost control of the vehicle. That one checks out.