Janna Breslin Fires Up The Grill, Obi-Wan Turns 52, Cubs Body Paint, Inclusive Michigan State, Asteroid City Cast
Well, it's the final day of March, which means we're so close to summer I can taste it. So can Janna Breslin, apparently, although she admittedly looks better leaning up against a Weber than I do.
Maybe not? I don't know -- I reckon I'll let you guys decide here in a bit. Guess it depends on what you're into.
Anyway, another week in the books here for Nightcaps, which is set to celebrate a big two-month anniversary on Monday. When my daughter turned two months old, she couldn't hold her head up yet.
On the other hand, I feel like we're not only walking already around here, we're damn near getting ready to run! To be fair, though, we were already drinking out the womb, so I guess the standard is a bit different.
Where were we? Oh yeah, summer! I've felt it percolating down here in Florida for a few weeks now, and while we had a bit of a cooldown this week, my weather app says global warming will be back with a vengeance starting tomorrow, with five of the next seven days forecast to be at least 90 degrees.
And I say, 'Yes please!' Sundress season, bikini season, grilling season -- it's all back. Well, at least for those of us south of the Mason Dixon. And if you don't live down here, you already know I have no empathy for you. Make better choices.
OK, moving on ... along with grilling Janna Breslin -- the latest heartthrob to be featured on what I've recently dubbed Nightcaps' New Star Friday -- we'll say happy birthday to Obi-Wan Kenobi, revisit a Russian model celebrating the Chicago Cubs with body paint, give Ring doorbell some free advertising and empty the tank from the week.
Sound good? OK, cool.
Let's all be like FAU Amanda -- yeah, might as well check in with her, too -- and focus in ahead of a big championship weekend.
It's grilling season with Janna Breslin
So, as I just said, Friday's have officially become the days we make stars here at Nightcaps. It's sort of happened organically over the past few weeks, but a trend is a trend, and this one is HOT right now.
We had gymnast Sydney Smith a few weeks ago -- the better Olivia Dunne, BTW -- accountant Hayley last week, and grilling Janna Breslin today.
Quite a trio! Thanks to the loyal readers with a sharp eye who always keeping us ahead of the trends.
Anyway, Janna here was recently brought to my attention and, thanks to our crack OutKick research department (Google), appears to be a fitness model, health coach, and nutrition expert who hails from San Diego.
Go Padres!
Milk, swords and the snow
Love it. Love a good health coach with a little giddy-up in her, and don't you think for one second the scent of an outdoor grill doesn't bring me contentment.
I wish I could bottle that smell up into an air freshener and plug it into every outlet in my house.
Anyway, Janna seems like an interesting follow on social media, and I admittedly went down a rabbit hole in the name of #research. And, I'll be honest with you, I did find some weird stuff ...
Happy Birthday, Obi-Wan Kenobi!
Don't think I've ever quite witnessed a spectrum that goes from horny hikes to bathing in milk, but that's why we're in the business of identifying stars here. You see something new every day and just have to sit back and enjoy the ride.
Sad to see Janna's a Darth Vader fan, though. That may be where I draw the line, because I'm Team Obi-Wan all day.
Speaking of ... happy 52nd birthday to Hello There himself, Ewan McGregor!
I don't know how many Star Wars fans we have here at OutKick, but you may as well scroll on down if you're not, because we're about to take five minutes and dive in.
Here are the obvious -- and definitive -- rankings.
No, I didn't include Mandalorian or Obi-Wan or any of the Disney one-offs in there because, frankly, I already started the list and forgot to include them and didn't feel like going back.
That being said, the Obi-Wan series from last summer was the best Star Wars thing I've seen in a long, looooong time.
These scenes still give me chills.
Feel like we missed an opportunity there for a little Duel of the Fates music, but maybe that would've been too over the top?
Anyway, I grew up with the Star Wars prequels and can remember them getting SLAMMED for years only for people to just now start appreciating them and, more importantly, Ewan McGregor.
Guy loves being Ben Kenobi, and deserves all the praise in the world.
PS: how bad was Last Jedi? What the hell are we doing here?
Ring doorbell saves the day
While that CGI sucked and pretty much ruined the sequel series for me altogether, not all technology is a bad thing.
Takes, for instances, this Ring doorbell in Tulsa, which channeled it's inner-Bill Belichick earlier this week and #diditsjob.
Don't come over here with that sh*t ... don't come over here with that sh*t! I'm calling the f***ing police.
Hilarious. Were they just sitting there glued to their monitor waiting for this crook? They need to teach me a thing or two, because I've had my truck broken in twice in two separate neighborhoods over the past six years.
I also had my Ron DeSantis yard sign stolen one time, too. In FLORIDA! Guess the literal one person who didn't vote for him last year lives nearby? Whatever, though. Guess who ordered a dozen more and promptly made his yard look like campaign headquarters?
This guy. Give 'em hell in '24, Mr. Governor!
Give me an FAU-Miami championship game
Speaking of the great, big, beautiful, free, non-extraditing state of Florida ... who we got in tomorrow's Final Four?
Feel like we can all pretty universally rally around a Miami-FAU title game, right? Jim Larrañaga is by far the best coach in college basketball and probably the most likeable human on earth, while Dusty May is as electric as they come.
It would also be by far the most random national championship game of all time, right? I mean, MIAMI VERSUS FAU?! What?
South Florida becoming a hotbed for college basketball is a development I didn't see coming, but I'm all about it. Plus, you know, FAU Amanda!
And guess what? According to her Instagram story, she's now an OutKick fan! Welcome aboard.
Inclusive Michigan State, Asteroid City cast and the Olive Burger
OK, it's the final Friday of March and we've got a big day of baseball, championship basketball and some ill-timed April Fools jokes to get ready for.
Let's get our horny hiking boots on like Janna Braslin and get to going!
First up ... the insufferable world of American academia!
The college? Michigan State, which just came out with a handy-dandy Inclusive Guide for all you rebels out there. From the Post:
Referring to classmates as freshmen or upperclassmen is a no-no.
Instead, the guide suggests you swap those for “first-year” and “advanced” to avoid “male-centric and western father-son language."
Evidently, the word female is a “pejorative term reduces women to their assumed biological anatomy.”
Don’t refer to anyone as “crazy,” “nuts” or “loony.”
That’s “ableist language.” But don’t worry — you can still call them “silly,” “absurd” or “outrageous.”
Avoid the word “terrorist” because it’s a “judgmental label.” Wouldn’t want to offend terrorists!
I hate us. I can't believe I live in this era.
From insufferable colleges to intolerable Hollywood! This isn't mean to rail against the Woke West, though.
Anyone see the trailer for Wes Anderson's newest movie, Asteroid City? It went mega-viral yesterday and looks like a wild ride. More importantly, look at this damn cast! I can't even imagine the budget for this movie.
Obviously you know I'm all in with Margot Robbie, though. Also, Liev Schreiber? Underrated as hell in Scream 2 AND the voice of Hard Knocks.
Small world.
Finally, this is for all my Michiganders out there ...
If you follow my other award-winning column - Monday Morning Pit-Stop - you know I'm a big NASCAR guy. If you don't follow it, you should, but that's just my unbiased opinion.
Anyway, I came across this post from driver Erik Jones a few days ago and my jaw hit the floor faster than when I saw Janna Braslin take a milk bath.
Excuse me? Come again. That looks -- and I don't say this to be dramatic -- absolutely disgusting. Makes me feel queasy.
And guess what? I love burgers, and I love olives! Some people hate olives, but I can eat 'em like chips.
But combining the two? Nope. I'm good. That can't be good, right? I mean, look at that bottom left picture! It looks foul.
Feel free to email me to prove me wrong, but I just don't see it happening.
Russian-American model Anne V takes us into the weekend
Obviously, I don't want to end the week with olive burgers. What a horrible way to dive into a Friday night.
So, let's start the weekend with model Anne V, who commemorated the return of baseball by reposting her infamous 2016 body paint picture celebrating the Chicago Cubs.
I missed this then, but I certainly did NOT miss it this time around.
And on that note, let's go have ourselves one hell of a weekend.
OutKick Nightcaps is a daily column set to run Monday through Friday at 4 p.m. (roughly, we’re not robots).
Ready to fire up the grill with Janna Breslin? Email me at Zach.Dean@OutKick.com.