Influencer Karin Hart Strips Down For New Tattoo, Revis Island Increases Population, Collinsworth Slides Around Deshaun & 150K For A Tom Brady Threesome
Welcome to our last weekend without football until February. I mean, besides Karin Hart declaring war on Paige Spiranac with a poolside heater, could I have said anything else to get your juices flowing more?
Didn't think so!
We made it. We had Cris Collinsworth sliding back into our lives last night, DeMarcus Ware stunning the universe with his vocal chords, dad bod Darrelle Revis and a Zach Wilson bomb. And now, here we are -- the last Friday before the preseason begins, and the final one without football for six glorious months.
Let's have a damn day, huh?
As Kenan Thompson would say at the start of every Kenan & Kel, we've got a great show for you tonight. I've got Karin Hart taking a break from the links to crush the pool, Collinsworth with a Deshaun Watson take, fat Darrelle Revis, and maybe some Tom Brady talk to wrap things up?
Sound good? And yes, you read that right a bit ago -- I am re-watching Kenan & Kel right now on Paramount+ and yes, it still holds up 30 years later. Kenan & Kel walked so Drake & Josh could run, you know.
How's that for some 90s and early-2000s nostalgia to kick off the weekend? You are welcome!
Let's mix some vodka and orange soda and jump the hell in. Friday's class is in session and we're gonna get weird.
Darrelle Revis turns heads in Canton
I know this is a day late and a dollar short, but whatever. It's still as jarring today as it was last night, and buddy, let me tell you -- my damn jaw DROPPED.
I loved Darrelle Revis back in the day, even as a Dolphins fan. He was awesome. About as lockdown as you could get on the outside, to the point where you literally wouldn't hear his name called for months at a time because teams just stopped throwing at him.
They say the best offensive lineman is the one you never talk about, and the same can be said about cornerbacks.
Now, speaking of the big cats up front ... yes, Revis Island added a couple colonies over the past few years. You saw it, I saw it, and, of course, the internet saw it.
Roll tape!
Cris Collinsworth gives us our first great take of the season
That last one is so true. Joe Thomas is shockingly skinny now, and Darrelle Revis is one of us. What a turn of events. Love Revis Island even more now. That's #MyDB1.
Also, that polo comment is 100% right. Risky little game right there, especially if you're headed out to the golf course. You're playing with fire from the get-go.
Speaking of playing with fire, let's check on how Cris Collinsworth's night went.
So, people are pissed about that little rundown from Cris, but I don't think it was anything terrible. Am I missing something?
For starters, I'd do my best just to ignore Watson the entire night -- especially if he's not playing. Seems like a pretty easy out if you're an announcer, right? The fact the Collinsworth broached the topic was a bold move, but you have to fill time during the HOF game, so I get it.
That being said, I know we'd all love these guys to come on there and just lay into Watson. Trust me, it would be awesome.
Here's a guy who's maybe the creepiest SOB on the planet.
Would LOVE that from Cris Collinsworth, but we ain't getting it, so I think we need to just accept this is how announcers are gonna talk about him from here on out. Treading lightly, walking on eggshells, head on a swivel throughout. No reason to get pissed about it anymore.
PS: nothing will EVER top this iconic moment.
Karin Hart closes the gap on Paige Spiranac
You all thought I was gonna go with the Brennaman/Castellanos moment, didn't you? Nope!
Nightcaps zigs while others zag.
You know who else does? Golf influencer Karin Hart, who's been hot on Paige Spiranac's heels for months now. Hart, the consensus No. 2 golf influencer in the world, is doing her damndest to climb the rankings as we head into the fall.
She's been on a bit of a heater lately, including this little number from late Thursday.
Hell, I'd bet on me too if I looked like that. Unfortunately, I'm far more on the Revis side of the spectrum, which is why I do not bet on myself outside of an all-you-can eat buffet.
Karin's got a long way to go to catch Paige Spiranac, but Rome wasn't built in a day. It's all about the journey, they say.
Keep grinding!
Golf with Tom Brady, Breaking Bad loses a legend and Zach Wilson's mom is pissed
By the way, I am DONE with the Barbie crap. Sorry. Can't do it anymore.
We were in bed last night and my wife mentioned that she wanted to see it and I couldn't say no fast enough. I offered to babysit instead! Do you know how bad something has to be for me to forego a night out with my hot wife?
So here's a quick memo to the all influencers out there: enough with the pink. Find me someone who dresses up like Oppenheimer or Indiana Jones and they'll immediately vault to the top of the rankings.
OK, rapid fire time on our way out.
Anyone wanna golf with Tom Brady and Jim Harbaugh? Frankly, it sort of sounds miserable, but I guess that's just me.
$155k for a round, which is around 10k a hole. Jim Harbaugh seems waaaaaaaaay to intense to golf with. The first time I tee up a breakfast ball after my first one sliced into the adjacent fairway, he'd probably kick my ass out. No thanks.
Tom, on the other hand, seems like he's mellowed out now that he's retired for a second time.
Tom Brady's definitely a Volcano Roll dude, right? By far the best roll and it ain't particularly close. Electric.
Speaking of electric, let's all pour one out for Mark Margolis -- better known as Hector Salamanca on Breaking Bad -- who died today at 83.
Dude gave us one of the most jaw-dropping moments in television history over a decade ago:
Truly one of the best scenes ever. The best TV show ever. That's right, I said it. And if you don't agree with that, fine. Season five of Breaking Bad is the GOAT, you can at least admit that, right?
I'll be honest with you, I started that list thinking it would be a lot easier then realized that it's hard as hell, so I'm probably forgetting something. Feel pretty good about those first two, though. The last scene of Season 4 of Dexter is also a showstopper.
Now, here's Lisa Wilson getting angry at some Jets fans talking crap at young Zach, even after he threw an absolute dart down the sidelines last night.
Happy birthday, Obama!
What a piss missile from our man Zach Wilson! Now, did he also miss a couple? Sure. But as is life in the NFL.
Actually, on second thought, maybe bringing in Aaron Rodgers was the right move.
Turf monster strikes again!
OK, that's all for today -- and for this week. Last weekend without football until February. Get your affairs in order now.
Here's some Barack Obama love on his 62nd birthday to get everyone hyped for a big weekend.
Just kidding! It's more of Paige Spiranac rival Karin Hart. Duh.
See you Monday.
OutKick Nightcaps is a daily column set to run Monday through Friday at 4 p.m. (roughly, we’re not robots).
Is Karin Hart worth the hype? Email me at Zach.Dean@OutKick.com.