Hockey Goalie Mikayla Demaiter Respects Summer & Brings The Heat, Clay Travis Has A New Job, Plus Joe Burrow's New Haircut
I'm now an assistant soccer coach for 1st and 2nd graders and I might've met my match
Last night was a beautiful night for those of us Respecting Summer and for those of us making our soccer coaching debuts. Holy s--t, it was pure chaos on that pitch. I wasn't mentally prepared for the vortex of screaming, bodies flying around, soccer balls coming for my head and kids blurting out just the most random things spewing from their brains.
Coaching baseball for 3rd and 4th graders was like managing a Triple-A baseball team compared to what I experienced last night. God bless Coach Paul who volunteered to be the head coach. It's just a six-week assignment, but he's about to go through straight hell.
Yes, I will be right there in the middle of most of it, but the soccer moms get to deal with Coach Paul.
Positives from a scrimmage against another team:
I'm not even going to do negatives because this league is literally all about having one practice a week --- running, laughing, having fun with other boys -- and then a one-hour game on Saturdays for six weeks. Meanwhile, little Messi on the club teams will be traveling to Indy, Cincinnati, Lexington, Columbus and Cleveland to play tournaments this fall and their parents will be hating life at the Country Inn & Suites all-you-can-scarf breakfast buffet in order to say their kids play travel soccer.
So...there are no negatives to this league -- yet -- outside of wrangling these little maniacs.
Here we go with another coaching assignment. Don't be shocked this fall when Saturday Screencaps is short and sweet. I have a city park to be at.
Lions fan isn't getting his hopes up
• Brian A. writes:
Lifelong Lions fan. They can go 10-0 to start the season and I'll still be skeptical. They have ONE playoff win since I was born, and I have kids who have graduated from college!
I used to go to the Thanksgiving game at the Silverdome when I was much younger, it was a family tradition. Now the family I did that with is spread out all over the country but my cousin is trying to put together an outing this year because he believes the hype.
Once Bitten Twice Shy (great hair band tune). I'm not committing to travel via either a 9-hour drive or a flight on Thanksgiving weekend, which is a nightmare, after one game where the other team was missing their 2nd best player on offense.
As a Bungles/Bengals fan I think you get my apprehension. Lions have had 3 of the best positional players in the last 30 years - Sanders, Johnson, and Stafford. Sanders and Johnson retired because of how awful the org was. Stafford was traded and literally (correct use of the term) won the Super Bowl the next year.
Signed,
Beat down but ever loyal Lions fan (and Tigers, Wings, Pistons, Wolverines - I think back then the hospital injected this loyalty it into your veins when you were born in Michigan/Detroit).
Kinsey:
Yes, it's too early, but Brian needs to remember that this Lions team has won six of its last seven games dating back to Dec. 1, 2022. Try to enjoy the ride a little bit, Lions fans. Don't be so fatalistic. Be like Browns fans who think they're going to the Super Bowl after winning on Week 1 for just the third time since 1998!
Tipping hits a wall
Remember: Screencaps ISN'T AGAINST TIPPING, BUT MANY OF US ARE AGAINST RIDICULOUS TIPPING REQUESTS FROM PEOPLE WHO HAND US A DRINK or a self-serve kiosk asking for a tip.
Economics professor Jared P. sent in this one:
"After holding steady for years, tipping at full-service restaurants fell to 19.4% in the second quarter of 2023, according to online restaurant platform Toast’s most recent restaurant trends report, notching the lowest average since the start of the Covid-19 pandemic."
The art of the sunset
• Paul "in a sane part of Illinois" writes:
Joe, just wanted to write about the sunrise vs. sunset pictures. I've been more of a sunset kind of guy my whole life. I think it comes from the fact I lived on the western edge of a town in southern Minnesota. My parents' house faced straight west and there was nothing in between our house and the next town, which was over 10 miles away, but corn and bean fields. I loved being able to see the town and lights by looking out our windows at night and it is where I fell in love with incredible sunsets.
It has been a good year for sunrise and sunset opportunities. We took a trip with my parents to Hawaii in February. Hawaii was state number 49 crossed off my list. Only Alaska is left. It was a great trip. My dad is now 81 and my mom is 76. My youngest turned one on the trip. It was great memories for us to be able to spend with my folks. Not sure how much longer they'll be able to do stuff like that. We caught a sunset on Maui, sunrise at Haleakala National Park, awesome experience, and saw the sunrise on the east side of Oahu. I've attached pictures of the sunrises and sunset.
Currently, I live in the country south of Chicago and I'm again surrounded by corn and bean fields. I love watching the sunset. I always told my wife that I didn't like living in the woods because you can't see anything. She grew up in Wisconsin and didn't know what I meant until we moved here. She has fallen in love with the sunsets over an ocean of land too. I'm partial to the sunset over the ocean of land. Add in the corn and beans which are starting to turn brown, it is magical. I'll attach pictures I got of a sunset here this summer.
I've got a few projects to get done with regards to landscaping this upcoming weekend. I'm going to overseed and reseed some grass. I planted a bunch of grass in the spring, but it was bone dry here in May and June. Plus the shade was too thick in one spot, so I'll try again.
I'm also going to complete a vision which my father in law had for my house. He was a landscape designer and retired two years ago. This spring, he came up with a simple sketch and ideas for what to plant around our front porch. He left it here in anticipation of helping me with it at a future date. We were all set to get those things planted on a weekend in August, but he suffered a series of strokes the weekend before we were supposed to plant. He passed the Tuesday before they were supposed to come. His funeral ended up being the day we would've planted his landscaping ideas. I'll have my older two boys help me implement grandpa's ideas and we'll cherish the memory of their grandpa together.
It has been a crazy month with my father in law's passing. I haven't kept up on screencaps as much, but I saw today's edition and figured I'd write in. I'd second Jess' recommendation of Brave. Great browser. Also, I've become hooked on the immaculate grid challenge. It comes out at the exact same time Screencaps does. If you haven't checked out the grid, give it a try and you'll know where a bunch of my internet time has gone these days.
Enjoy the column and advice about landscaping and real life stuff.
Mowing in England
• Ken S. in North Augusta, SC gives us another mowing report from England:
Checking in with my final report from England. After finishing our long (and exhausting) walk on Offa’s Dyke Path, we rewarded ourselves with a little luxury, booking a country hotel in Hampshire, near Winchester.
First photo is Winchester Cathedral…a phenomenal work. Second photo is ruins of a 14th century chapel on our hotel grounds, and the third is what I’ve been searching for - proof that the Brits could be contenders in the Thursday Night Mowing League!
I took the photo of the entrance to our hotel on Friday - and just look at those stripes! one thing for certain - the British can do lawns!
Heading home tomorrow and looking forward to seeing my lawn. Perhaps a little worried about how the contractor handled the responsibility!
'Christmas creep'
• Steve in Baton Rouge writes:
t's been a looooong and especially hot summer, even for the deep south, so allowing thoughts of cooler days and nights is a very real temptation. Then I see this on the shelves of my local Winn Dixie this past weekend. I've been texting back and forth with my brother about Halloween creep and then this hits. The threat to summer is stronger than you think!!
Keep up the great work.
Kinsey:
Are any of you drinking egg nog in September? Is there some mixed drink I'm not aware of this time of year that needs the secret ingredient? Is TikTok to blame?
Respect Summer
• John L. writes:
Pulled into Nantucket this past Sunday for 2 weeks on the island. Thankfully the Instagram influencers generally leave by Labor Day. We'll see what Hurricane Lee stirs up.
Kinsey:
Meanwhile, in SE Michigan:
Tug quotes
• John in Milford, MI writes:
Good Tug McGraw quote in Screencaps today, but this one might be his greatest.
Pretty sure Aaron Rodgers preference for grass (in both ways) is more clear-cut.
That's it for this edition.
Get those fantasy football rosters organized. Make sure you realize a hurricane could hit New England. Let's have a strong mid-September day. Enjoy the daylight, the sunsets, the patio cocktails and another day of life.
Take care.
Email: joekinsey@gmail.com
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