Is Hawk Tuah Girl A CIA Victim?
A hot new Hawk Tuah girl conspiracy theory is taking the internet by storm, and it's an absolute banger.
Unless you've been living under a rock, you already know who Hawk Tuah girl - real name Hailey Welch - is thanks to her viral interview in Nashville.
She might be the second most famous woman on the internet right now, behind only Caitlin Clark. The memes are gold, people are having fun with it, and she's making money.
But what if there was a more sinister situation unfolding right before our eyes?
Hawk Tuah CIA conspiracy theory goes viral on X.
What if instead of Welch being a funny young woman going viral for making a crack about sex, she was actually an unknowing victim of a grand CIA conspiracy.
Get your tinfoil hats on because things are about to get weird.
Popular X account Matthew Wallace is going viral after floating a theory that is so wild it's hard to believe it's real.
He stated in a Tuesday tweet that much of the information about Welch is untrue. I have no idea if that's the case or not, but where he really got spicy was when he found the people responsible for Welch's comments:
The CIA.
"She is not a pop culture hero, she is another victim of the CIA planted culture of sleeping with countless men and substance abuse normalization. They also edited out the part where she shows her butt (I will post the link to the full video below) and multiple other things, including where she talks about having sex with random men from behind so they don’t have to make eye contact. Don’t be mean to her, as this is not her fault. They are purposely filling our culture with degeneracy to keep the population controlled, weak, and unhappy," Wallace wrote in a tweet that has been seen more than 3.7 million times.
Yes, the CIA is somehow responsible for a cute blonde girl walking around Nashville at night and doing an interview involving a sex joke.
This is some real big brain thinking, but I'm here for it. I'd like to imagine there's a dozen CIA leaders in a smoke-filled room around a big marble table debating how to ruin America.
They have one genius idea:
Promote sex and loose morals.
Why waste your time catching terrorists and killing bad guys - something the CIA loves to do - when you can push attractive women to go viral for cracking sex jokes.
It was in front of us the entire time, and yet, nobody ever noticed, apparently. She's not a cute and witty young woman. She's the victim of the CIA. The question now is how many more victims of this nefarious plot might there be? Who has all been impacted?
Is Hawk Tuah girl Hailey Welch a victim of the CIA? (Photo by Brooks Kraft LLC/Corbis via Getty Images)
Finally, if you think the CIA or any other government organization is competent enough to pull off some grand scheme to get young people to have more sex - amid a massive sex rate decline - then you haven't looked under the hood of the car in a very long time. Inefficiency is the name of the game when it comes to the government. Plus, do you really think young people need to be motivated to talk about sex? Not at all. So, I feel confident saying Welch is *NOT* the victim of a CIA operation, but I could be wrong! Let me know what you think at David.Hookstead@outkick.com.