Gracie Hunt Chooses Patriotism On Halloween, Hooters Girls Play Dress-Up & A Disgusting New Gen-Z Trend

Well, here we are. The day. The day. Halloween. The big one. For kids, it's a chance to stay up all night, eat candy, puke, and probably inherit a months-worth of nightmares because there's a knife-wielding teenage clown roaming your neighborhood. 

For adults – mainly influencers – it's their Super Bowl. This is the day they've been planning for weeks now. A lot of blood, sweat and tears goes into it for them. How do they win the internet? How do they get in tomorrow morning's news cycle? More importantly, how do they stay in it?

For the vets of the industry – Paige, Livvy, Heidi – it's not a big deal. They've already established themselves. Whatever they do tonight is simply icing on top. 

But for the up-and-comers in the game, tonight is everything. Happy Halloween, boys and girls. Let's ride. 

Welcome to a Thursday Nightcaps – the one where we love this great, big, beautiful country with Chiefs Heiress Gracie Hunt, and then check in on the Hooters girls. 

What else? I've got a couple more Halloween lists to get to courtesy of Clay, we all brace ourselves for Mariah Carey in T-minus 8 hours, and Ryan Fitzpatrick may be my new favorite follow on Twitter. 

Seriously, this guy has got it when it comes to elite trolling. He went after Billy Belichick and his cheerleader girlfriend last night, and I am HOOKED. Great player, even better troll. 

OK, that's enough for now. I have to go lay down some newspaper so I can carve the shit out of some pumpkins on my living room floor while blaring the Halloween theme throughout the house on loop. 

Let's get weird. 

Pencils up!

Ranking the Halloween slashers 

You didn't think I'd let this day pass by without pumping out another Mount Rushmore, did you? Come on. This is MY holiday. Nobody on this planet respects Halloween more than I do. You know what I did last night? I watched Halloween: H20. Seriously. 

I realized that nearly the entire season had come and gone and I hadn't watched it yet. So, instead of going to bed at a reasonable hour because all the kids had somehow gone down without a fight, I poured a tumbler of whiskey, threw in a nicotine pouch, and watched Jamie Lee battle Michael Myers for two hours. 

Now, did my toddler wake up at 12:30 and derail my night? Sure did. But it was worth it, because I needed to get that one in before the buzzer. Tonight? Tonight we watch the OG Halloween in silence. 

No phones. No kids. No talking. 

We watch, we enjoy, and we appreciate the greatest horror movie of all time. 

The obvious answer here is Michael Myers, and it's not even close. Sure, the character goes through some pretty dramatic changes over the years – the masks in Halloween 4 and 5 are still insane compared to the others – but the idea behind them remains the same throughout. 

Mount Rushmore of slashers? Mount Rushmore of slashers!

1. Michael Myers 

2. Jason

3. Freddy

4. Leatherface

The first three were pretty easy. Mikey is No. 1, and I took Jason over Freddy just based on effort alone. Jason attacks throughout the day. Freddy is pretty limited in what he can do because you have to be asleep. 

Feel like I'd be able to easily navigate that right now seeing as I don't sleep with two kids as it is. Wouldn't even faze me. 

Now, I replaced Chucky with Leatherface because Chucky is a stupid doll and Leatherface literally wears human faces as his own and runs at you with a chainsaw. I always say choose your fighter, and that one is a no-brainer. 

Plus … Jessica Biel in the Texas remake back in 2003 was an all-timer:

Solid start to Halloween SZN by Ryan Clark!

Didn't think I'd be using a spot the butt tweet from Jason Voorhees to prove my point, but that's why they pay me to teach this class. It ain't for everyone. You are welcome!

Anyway, I do get sad this time of day because all the scary stuff is on the way out, and the Christmas decor is ushered in before the blood even dries. At midnight, it's over. Just like that. The pumpkins, the skeletons, the slashers – they're all just gone. Like they didn't even exist. Sad. 

And I'm telling you, when you wake up tomorrow morning, it'll be Christmas EVERYTHING. Everything. I promise you, insufferable Mariah Carey has her stupid song locked and loaded in her Twitter drafts as we speak. She's just waiting to hit send when the clock hits midnight. You watch. 

She's coming. Winter is here. Stay alert. Don't give in. Joe respects summer, and I respect Halloween. Around here, it's common courtesy to wait TWO weeks before making the official change to Christmas SZN. At least. 

Now, back to Halloween. 

Let's check in with … Ryan Clark!!!

Gracie Hunt loves this country, what a wild TikTok trend & Ryan Fitzpatrick is a menace 

I wrote about woke Ryan this morning, so circle back here when you're bored and waiting for your kid to knock on the 100th door later tonight. 

In short, virtue-signaling Rhino dressed as Bill Belichick and the internet noticed that one is white and the other is black. Their point, which is probably a fair one … what if the shoe was on the other foot? 

It would be chaos. CNN hosts would be melting. The pitchforks would be out. The mob would be SEETHING. Kamala would probably call a presser just to address it. The FBI would probably look into it. 

And Ryan Clark – again, one of the wokest, most unhinged people in sports – would be the first one to call him or her out. 

Anyway, I don't care what anyone wears for Halloween. Or what any comedian says about someone, something, or some region. I just don't. But the Libs do … until they don't. Don't forget it. 

OK, rapid-fire time because there's a Shipyard in my fridge just begging to be cracked. First up? Speaking of Billy B …

Hilarious. What a response. Look, I loved Ryan Fitzpatrick as a player. The one season he started in Miami was insanely fun even though the team stunk. 

But this new, post-playing career Fitzpatrick? Off the charts. 

What a career path. Love it. Stay the course, Ryan! And welcome back to class, Jordon and Bill!

Next? Speaking of Gen-Zers who make questionable decisions …

Is this a new trend? I mean, my God. What a tightrope. Makes Russian Roulette look tame. This, by the way, is why the left wants Kamala Harris in office. I'll go ahead and let y'all connect those dots later. 

Finally, let's get back to folks who love this great country, like Nightcaps legend Gracie Hunt:

Take us into Halloween night, Hooters girls

She doesn't have to come out and say it, but we all know who Gracie is voting for next week. And it ain't Jill Stein!

OK, that's it for today. Let's all go out there and have a big Halloween night. Live it up. Winter is coming. 

Take us there, Hooters girls!

OutKick Nightcaps is a daily column set to run Monday through Friday at 4 p.m. (roughly, we’re not robots).

How's my slashers Mount Rushmore? Email me at Zach.Dean@OutKick.com.