Grace Boor Starts Fall In Turks And Caicos, John Daly Has Huge Sack Thanks To Hornets, Plus A Plate-Flipping Device Toll Road Bust
Can fans retire or quit on their teams?
Monday, we heard from Andy in Knoxville who's quitting on his beloved Vols. He's giving up his fandom. That email was met with a flurry of activity via the Screencaps email inbox.
• Steve B. in Grand Junction, CO writes:
As a CU grad and Broncos fan, you can say I've had better weekends.
However with all due respect to Clay and to Gator-fan Andy in Knoxville, I think if you are retiring as a fan, you may not have really been a fan in the first place.
Trust me, I get wanting to quit your fandom. At the end of the 1996 NFL season, my Broncos had set the table to win it all. It was the height of the Elway era and we were 13-3 with the AFC's #1 seed. After years of Super Bowl blowouts and being the butt of national jokes ("The Simpsons" had an episode making fun of us!), this was our year. Plus our first playoff game was going to be against an expansion team!
Fast forward three hours later, the Broncos fall to Jacksonville. "Devastating" is not the word. I decided to "retire" from the Broncos.
After licking my wounds, I recovered and was in the Mile High Stadium stands opening game that September, which is fortunate, because we won the Super Bowl the next two years.
A fan has to endure the brutal blowouts and nail-biting heartbreaking losses in order to appreciate the wins.
My 11 year-old son has never remembered a time when the Broncos didn't suck. Sunday, as we watched our team lose by....gulp....7 touchdowns, it coincided with the Rockies setting a franchise record for most losses in a season.
I told him to remember this day, because one day, (maybe decades from now), the Rockies will win the World Series and the Broncos will nab their 4th Lombardi trophy. And, as a true, loyal fan - you'll be able to bask in the pure joy of the moment and appreciate it unlike anyone else.
• John C. in Bowling Green, KY writes:
I have a message for Andy from Knoxville. I have the proxy of the Vol Nation and would like it passed on verbatim:
"Git!"
• Rick D. in Brentwood, TN writes:
When you’re a Vol fan for life, it’s impossible to give up on the Volunteers. You can tell yourself you won’t care in the future, and it’s a nice dream to have, but it’s not going to happen.
It’s kind of like if your wife turns you down for sex for the umpteenth time. Your feelings get hurt and you think “that’s it, I’m not having sex with her again any time soon.”
But the next time she gets naked, even if it’s 10 minutes later, you’re there.
Next year when the Gators roll into Knoxville, all of us Vol faithful including Andy will be sucked into the hype and we’ll make that emotional investment once again.
Kinsey:
Can't say I was expecting Rick D. to use a sex analogy this morning while talking about the Vols and quitting on them, but here we are and I like it. We'll have to check back in with Andy later this fall to see if he's back to having HYPOTHETICAL sex with his Vols.
'Pro sports hates me'
• Bill H. didn't think I would post this message:
These days, the most I know about pro sports I read, because most pro sports genres hate me, love my money, but hates me. So they are the contagion I avoid and shun. I thought I was a one-man show, but others are out there.
This prof has traversed the enlightened trail that I have:
Pigskins et Circenses - The American Conservative
Don't get me wrong, I love sports and love playing them, but modern social dystopian pro sports are an anathema to me and should be to a majority of "fans", too. I miss the games but will never miss the modern sports messages. Division breeds hatred, therefore, I can no longer watch. The optics are appalling.
I will dig college sports until they take on the messaging of their pro bigs and some of them are inching onto my fecal roster, too.
Kinsey:
There are a bunch of big words in there, so I'm going to need Bill to drill down a little bit into his message because it feels like I'm reading the NY Times opinion page with all those elite words.
I need a few things from Bill:
Come on, Bill, cheer up. Stop with the big words. Snap out of it or I'll go back to blocking your emails.
I get the anger over the stupid end-zone messages that aren't going to end racism and how they're being used to appease. I get the anger over the stupid helmet messages that aren't going to end racism. I've battled the NFL over its woke Instagram editors who praised a woman who made up a story about how she was attacked.
Now, if that drove you away from the game, I'm not going to argue over how you feel. I will, however, ask you to provide some details on exactly why you're hurt. No more elite word usage, Bill!
Now this is how you NIL!
Congrats to the Iowa Pork Producers Association for having this fall into its lap thanks to the families that sent their kids to Iowa State.
I want you to save, bookmark, screenshot, etc. this so you have it handy in the spring when the nutjobs are screaming about saving the honey bees and how you're a terrorist
Thanks to Mike T. in Idaho for having his head on a swivel and catching this one in the New York Times of all places.
“If someone were to call me today, I would advise them to put up a hotel for solitary bees or boxes for bumblebees. Or plant some trees instead,” said a beekeeper the Times interviewed for the piece.
'The Best Column in the Land'
• Texan Mike N. writes:
1. As a loyal reader (iPhone, Twitter, Firefox, all links AOK) definitely up for more content. For example, can you clip your part/ interviews on podcasts and post?
2. With my oldest son at A&M, I can confirm "rabid" fans. I can also confirm everybody would take a new coach in a heartbeat (insane buyout).
3. To further John from SD sentiments (sorry about your friend): A fantastic way to spend time with your kids is coaching them. No experience necessary.
4. Last night of summer: Friday Night Lights. 1st morning of Fall: College football. 2 games in 12 hours. Blessed to live in the greatest country in the world.
Bud Light report from Lambeau
• Pete in Golden, Colorado (the guy with the great outdoor shower) writes:
Congrats on your Bengals first win of the season last night…
I was fortunate enough to be at Lambeau Field for the Packers/Saints game last weekend. As a dedicated fan and tailgater, I was in the Lot 3 at 8:00 am cooking brats and having cold beers for breakfast.
While it was an outstanding crowd tailgating in the parking lots, I did not see a single Bud Light being consumed. Granted, there were a lot of tailgaters with the nice weather and it being the home opener in Green Bay, and I didn’t make a scientific study by visiting every group I could, but I did make a few trips through Lot 3 and noted what was in the hands of the hundreds (thousands??) of people that walked past us.
Not a single Bud Light did I see…
I did see a few of these pass through my own hands:
…and Busch Light was very popular:
We drank 16 oz. cans of Coors Light in the stadium…the hometown beer for me:
But Bud Light…not so much. The boycott seems to be very, very persistent.
Favorite discontinued fast-food items
• Ryan in Oklahoma writes:
Fantastic article this morning as always. I am right there with you that it was a crime against humanity that Chick-fil-A changed their breakfast burrito and made it exponentially worse.
However, a greater culinary travesty was committed by Whataburger (roughly around the time the family sold it to a restaurant conglomerate out of the Windy City of Drive-bys): the cancellation of the Monterrey melt.
Breaks my heart I can no longer get one (also probably good for my heart I can no longer get one).
• Michael J. in Chiraq writes:
Discontinued fast food items are a touchy subject for me. Mostly because of Arby's. I think back to 15 years ago. When I could get an Arby-Q, Potato Cakes and a Pepsi as a meal. An all time favorite meal of mine. None of those items are available anymore. Huge disappointment.
No, I'm not talking about ending the Screencaps written word....to the contrary!
Remember, when others on the Internet zig, I zag. I've made money at this gig for 16 years this fall. As the Internet moves further and further away from the written word, I embrace the written word, except when Bill H. tries to go Tolstoy on me.
• Levi E. writes:
Saw the question today about turning screencaps into more audio/visual. No no no!! I like to read the content and digest the words and thoughts. Please don’t turn it into video (you said it was a pain to do anyway).
Kinsey:
I'm talking about adding more options. More content. Screencaps interviews in audio/video that would be ADDITIONAL Screencaps content options, not less. You'd still get this beautiful column on a daily basis.
And I'm still waiting to hear from people on what they like out of newsletters. What should a weekly newsletter have in it? I see all these newsletter guys swearing by the medium. I'm willing to dabble, but I want to know what makes them so great.
SE Michigan wood report
• Diesel checks in this morning after ordering up his yearly truckload of the hardest wood on the market. This guy is about to hunker down:
That's it. Gotta run.
Go have an incredible final Wednesday in September 2023, especially to those who are taking a day to get their heads right after a long run at work. Enjoy that time off.
Email: joekinsey@gmail.com