George Springer's Wife Ready For Opening Day, Danica Patrick's Slice, Spring Break Emily Dares The Cartel, Carjacker's Bold Move

Ya'll smell that? No? Try again -- this time, give it a really good sniff. No, animals. It's not George Springer's wife. Have some class!

Freshly mowed grass (and hey, it's Thursday!), perfect chalk lines, giant hot dogs, overly-priced domestic beer, the slightest whiff of a perfectly caramelized onion, notes of peanut shells scattered all over the place.

Yeah, it's one of the greatest smells on earth. Bottle it up, give it a shake and spray it all over me. Seriously, douse me in it.

Baseball is back, and nothing can compare to Opening Day. I don't care if you're a baseball fan or not, MLB opening day is America at our finest. Know how I know?

I'm a Red Sox fan, and we're gonna STINK this year. Seriously, Corey Kluber is our opening day starter. What are we doing here? It literally took five pitches for him to give up a ding-dong today.

That being said, guess what game I've been LOCKED in on for the past two hours? The Sox, who are currently at Fenway Park, which is the exact place I think of when describing those scents of baseball.

Ever been? Go. Trust me, just go. Hope you're not heavy, though. People were a lot tinier back in 1912.

I mean, if there's ever a more perfect day for nightcap, it's today -- Opening Day 2023. Hell, maybe you're at the park right now standing in the obnoxiously long beer line trying to kill time?

If so, settle in. We've got George Springer's wife, Charlise Springer, getting us excited for some Blue Jays baseball, Danica Patrick with a wicked shot off the tee, the bravest spring breaker you'll ever meet, and a hot air balloon coming in ... hot!

Bottoms (batter) up!

George and Charlise Springer are electric in Canada.

Welcome back baseball and welcome to OutKick, Charlise Springer

So, now you know I'm a Red Sox fan, and you know we're going to be awful this year. Hope we are, too. We deserve to suck so Chaim Bloom can get sent to the sun. Hate that guy.

Anyway, the Blue Jays will most definitely NOT stink. In fact, they're a popular World Series pick, and I'm all about it. Give me a Mariners-Blue Jays ALCS all day. Need it. For the love of God, please don't make me sit through six months of Yankees-Astros hype.

I was scrolling social media hours before first pitch looking for any #content, and I stumbled on Charlise Springer. And guess what? We most definitely have our next OutKick star who, by the way, also played college softball at Albany.

Ley's play some damn ball!

Canada doesn't deserve George Springer or his wife

Unreal. Who knew? I despise Canada -- mainly because of all the COVID crap -- and this only fuels that anger. Feel like Canada doesn't deserve Charlise, not on opening day, at least.

This is America's holiday.

Anyway, all that to say the Blue Jays are my pick to win it all this year. I was pretty up in the air before discovering George Springer's wife, but Charlise sealed it for me.

At the very least, get the Jays back to the postseason in Toronto. Anyone remember this electric playoff moment?

My God. And they say baseball is boring. Shut the hell up with that. October baseball is awesome. Opening day is awesome.

Fine, everything in between can be a little boring, but whatever. Here's more Charlise. She ain't boring.

Blue Jays over the Padres in 7.

Danica Patrick off the tee

From home plate to the tee box, where we find Danica Patrick playing 18 with her parents.

Now, before we get to this latest round, let's remember that it was just last month when Danica sent the internet into a tizzy when she posted a couple wild videos from the driving range.

At the time, she claimed it was her first time at the range, which I immediately called BS on based on her iron shots.

I mean, did those irons look like a first-timer? I don't think so.

Fast-forward to yesterday, and Danica Patrick was back on the course with mom and dad looking like an absolute fashionista.

Seriously, what a damn outfit our girl put together for this round.

Anyway, what do we think about the tee shot? We in or we out on Danica's golf game?

You know what? I thought this was a slice at first, but upon further review I think she's OK? Don't hate it.

I took some heat last month when I dared to call out Danica Patrick, but I think I was right. She's pretty damn good at golf and looks like she's only getting better.

How about this commitment, too? Nothing says dedication like playing 18 after getting a facial!

Danica Patrick plays 18.

Spring breaker Emily dares the Mexican Cartel

From facials with Danica to pool time with Australian spring breaker Emily Doe! How's that for a transition?

Don't know if you've heard, but -- as Trump once said -- there are some bad hombres south of the border right now, which is unfortunate because it's peak Spring Break season.

The US of A issued a travel warning for Quintana Roo -- a notorious spring break hot spot -- last week, and the American partiers have apparently been listening.

But you know who doesn't care about the pesky Cartel? Aussie heartthrob Emily Doe, who told The Daily Mail, 'Bring it on!'

Emily Doe, 28, of Perth, Australia, sporting a fluorescent teal bikini top and a sarong, frolicked in front of the giant guitar that marks the Hard Rock Café with a group of Aussies who had flown in for a group vacation.

She hadn't heard about the travel warning, but she said she wasn't worried about kidnapping or cartel violence.

'I'd like to see them try,' she said.

Her group had just stepped out of Grand Oasis where they were doing some day drinking.

'You only live once,' Doe said. 'What are the odds of anything happening?'

Don't let the man get you down, Emily. You only live once, baby! We ain't scared of a little cartel action down here in Cancun.

Give it your best shot, fellas.

Hot air balloon coming in hot, carjacker goes for it and what sign placement!

Let's all jump on the spring break Emily train and kick this thing into high gear before George Springer and the Blue Jays begin their World Series march in St. Louis.

For some reason, I've stumbled onto a bunch of crash videos this week that I've been saving up, so this has randomly become the 'Vehicular Crash' portion of today's Nightcaps.

And yes, there was one death involved. Don't know what to tell you -- the video is everywhere online and honestly if you're gonna jump out of a stolen police car going 45 MPH and you die, that's on you.

Fine, here ya go!

Whoooooooof. That was never gonna end well, and ... it didn't. From Mediaite:

It all began on Tuesday when California Highway Patrol was called to a freeway after being alerted about a reckless driver who crashed into another car. When officers arrived to investigate, the suspect somehow managed to get into the patrol car and drove off.

Obviously, the chase was on after that, and you see how it ended.

Officers arrived moments later to move the suspect’s body out of the road, and they tried to administer first aid until the ambulance arrived. The suspect was later confirmed dead from his injuries.

Yep, pavement to the noggin at 45 MPH will usually do the trick every single time. Tough way to go.

From the ground to the air!

Talk about coming in HOT! Love how everyone just spends the first five seconds videoing the incoming balloon instead of moving out of the way, too. Talk about pure 2023. And then, of course, when they all realize they're about to get crushed to death, it's chaos.

I've obviously never been on a hot air balloon and don't ever plan on going on one, either. If you've followed me long enough, you know I despise flying. Hate it. Scared to death of it.

That being said, how about this picture one reader sent me over the weekend?

Funny is funny -- I don't care if it's dark humor or not. This is funny. What sign placement! Who's getting fired for that one?

Gonna go ahead and mark Turkish Airlines off my list, joining Malaysian Airlines, Allegiant and Egypt Air. Really, if it ain't Delta or jetBlue, I don't have time for it.

Great news, we're going to live forever!

Now, all of that being said, one scientist may ease my fear of flying just a bit if his latest prediction is correct.

Wow! Bombshell news if true. If you didn't watch the video, Futurist Ray has been right before, too. Apparently, he predicted widespread portable computer use would be a thing by 2009 AND a computer would beat the world's best chess player by the year 2000.

That last one is a WILD prediction to make, by the way.

Anyway, looks like we all only have to take it easy for another seven years and then the gloves are apparently set to come off.

Can't wait!

And on that happy note, let's go out and play 1 of 162. Can't win 'em all if you don't win the first one!

OutKick Nightcaps is a daily column set to run Monday through Friday at 4 p.m. (roughly, we’re not robots).

Think there's a better MLB WAG than Mrs. George Springer? Email me at Zach.Dean@OutKick.com.