Elizabeth Hurley's Respect For Summer Is Unrivaled
I've been on this Respect Summer journey the last 3-4 weeks as I've watched Americans wish away the final month of summer by putting out pumpkins, drinking pumpkin spice lattes, cheering the local weather guy when he would post Facebook weather updates with highs in the 60s and buying Christmas wrapping paper from Costco and all of it made me want to puke.
So I did something about it by creating the Respect Summer movement where Americans fight back against the brand marketing departments. They want you to wish away summer because the Back to School money dries up and they need a bridge to Halloween.
Dunkin' brought out its pumpkin spice offerings in mid-August and women instantly thought they had to start buying straw from the local farm store for the patio -- to put out on Labor Day! That's mind-control, folks. Marketing experts specialize in it. One minute you're respecting summer and enjoying nights on the patio suckin' down margaritas, the next minute your lips touch a pumpkin beer and you're instantly craving a hoodie, a good book and a fuzzy blanket.
We're better than this, folks. We must overcome.
Enter Elizabeth Hurley.
I'll say it again: Nobody respects summer like 58-year-old Liz Hurley.
Sure, there are Instagram D-list pretenders who'll dump out bikini content they've saved up for months and then there's Hurley who actually walks the walk and lives the Respect Summer lifestyle. She doesn't need Instagram 'Likes' to feel accomplished.
She's too old for that game. She's busy LIVING.
"In heaven 💗 Ibiza Bikini," Hurley wrote on Instagram Thursday as summer's final hours dwindle down across the northern hemisphere.
She's soaking up every last minute of it before the autumnal equinox early Saturday morning.
Meanwhile, the suburban housewives are busy Pinteresting the shit out of their front patios with cornstalks and the rest of the crap that their girlfriends post in text groups.
Not Hurley.
She's barely been clothed since early August when she went out to some gala with Joan Collins who is 90, yet doesn't look a day over 50.
I get it, the Respect Summer movement isn't for everyone. There are those of you who are weak-minded because your lips have touched a pumpkin beer, or god forbid you've consumed a pumpkin spice drink and the testosterone has drained from your soul.
For the others, there is hope that you'll come around to see that life and summer are too short and both are to be respected.
Look in the mirror and decide which side of the aisle you're on: Are you with Dunkin' or are you with Elizabeth Hurley and the Respect Summer team?