Creepy Jill Biden Kiss, Phil Knight Casually Watches LeBron, Mr. Feeny The Swinger And A Jeopardy! Fail
Hold up. Leave your finest orange three-piece tux at home, it won't be needed. With apologies to Lloyd Christmas, you won't be attending the Preservations Gala in support of hooters in this space. Nope.
(Although, let the record show, I am firmly for the hooters.)
Instead, buckle in for day three of OutKick's new venture, Nightcaps. If you're not familiar with Nightcaps (where the hell have you been all week?), this is a daily afternoon column that’s a little bit of booze and a little bit of news. Think of this spot as your afternoon reservation to a safe space, minus the emotional support animal.
If you’re looking for a breakdown of how the Chiefs might slow the Eagles pass rush on Sunday, A) you’re going to be awfully disappointed and B) my God do I feel bad for you.
Nightcaps drops at roughly 4pm EST Monday through Friday. But don't be married to that time slot, we're not big on punching time clocks here at OutKick. Oh, and before I forget, this column will be manned (and womanned) by different OutKickers throughout the week. Zach Dean led off Monday and I was in the two and three holes (get your mind out of the gutter), before Dean swoops back in to bat cleanup. There'll eventually be other OutKickers in the rotation, but for now, we're keeping it tighter than Madonna's new face!
Comments, suggestions and the type of pictures that would get you fired can be sent to yours truly: anthony.farris@outkick.com.
Jill Biden Gets Weird With Doug Emhoff
The first lady, Jill Biden, and the second gentleman, Doug Emhoff, got-it-on during last night's State of the Union. Well, not exactly. But they sure as hell looked like they were ready to break the cigars out in the Oval Office.
Mr. Feeny Was Gettin' Down!
Speaking of TV, we recently learned that Mr. Feeny of Boy Meets World (we know you were watching. I mean, Topanga, c'mon.) fame likely wasn't big on the monotony associated with dining at home every night. Instead, Feeny wanted to hit the buffet and try something new as often as he could.
The New York Post recently reported that William Daniels, aka "Mr Feeny," "never felt tied to fidelity." His wife of 72 years, Bartlett, commented "I guess it was a little bit of an open marriage at first." Bartlett told The Post: "It was at a time in New York when there was a lot of sex and a lot of people doing all kinds of things, you know - very free."
Who had Feeny as a swinger on their Bingo card?
No Phone Needed For Nike's Phil Knight
If you didn't hear, LeBron did a thing last night. Along with a bunch of other gazzilionaires, Nike's Phil Knight was in attendance. And Knight pulled an all-time boss move by going sans-phone during LBJ's moment.
LeBron wasn't the only one making history in the NBA last night. Chicago's Andre Drummond had a historically bad attempt of a Euro-step.
Another Jeopardy! Fail
Did you see the pair of numb nuts on Jeopardy! who know nothing about Geography, baseball or movies?
While we're on the subject of hoops and fails, check out this referee whose shoe game definitely caught an L. She officiated my son's basketball game over the weekend and I can confirm that she never crossed half court. Her shoes literally prevented her from doing anything other than gingerly walking three steps forward and three steps back. I've seen smaller boats in Lake Erie!
I Had A Fan(Stasche)Tic Time
In yesterday's Nightcaps I asked you, the loyal OutKick readers, to chime in with their favorite lip furniture from '80s athletes. And not surprisingly, you guys didn't disappoint.
Among the other submissions were one from a fictional character sent to me from an emailer, "Fast Eddie" in Columbus. Not technically an '80s pro athlete, but you bet your ass Apollo Creed deserves some love.
Want to nominate a mustache? Hit me on Twitter, @OhioAF.
Are We Doing The Dew?
If ever there were a drink ready-made for Florida...
Save Some Ladies For The Rest Of Us
You too, youngin'.
Hanging With Hayley - Leonardo DiCaprio Edition
As Joe Kinsey told us, some of the internet is somehow stunned that Leonardo DiCaprio is shacking up with a 19-year-old. OutKick's Hayley Caronia chimed in on Leo's love life and tells us about the "half-plus-seven-rule." I'm not much for math (hence, my pre-Algebra class as a high school sophomore), so I'll side with Hayley here.
You're going to want to follow Hayley on Twitter (@hayleycaronia). This week, she'll be at both the Waste Management Phoenix Open AND the Super Bowl.
Jersey Sure?
I need to get something off my chest. I have a love/hate relationship with adults wearing sports jerseys. Part of me hates a grown-ass man dressing like a little boy to show support of an athlete half their age. But, I LOVE - we're talking Honeymoon phase love here - when someone rocks an obscure jersey, especially in an odd place. Think, Randall Cunningham Vikings jersey at your daughter's spelling bee, and you live in Sacramento.
Case in point:
That's Big Country baby!
If you spot an out of place sports jersey, especially one of the obscure variety, please send it my way.
Oh, By The Way, What's Up Jake The Snake?
Until Next Time...
That's it for me. Remember, same bat time, same bat channel for Nightcaps every week day around 4pm EST. Now fill up another glass while I multiway my task to the gym (couch).
Cheers!
Follow along on Twitter: @OhioAF