Bill de Blasio And His Lesbian Wife Are Separating To 'Have Fun' But Still Plan To Live Together

Buckle up, because I'm about to take you on the wildest ride of the year. And no, this is NOT satire. It's all real. 100% real.

In a three-hour interview with the NY Times, de Blasio and his wife -- sitting together in their home with their hands "cupped" -- told the outlet how it all came to a head.

Bottom line? They don't love each other any more, haven't in quite some time, and want to quickly get back out there and start testing the waters.

According to the Times, there was also at least one "high-five" during the interview, which ended in the the most beautiful way possible:

Ms. McCray asked dryly if their phone numbers could be included in the newspaper.

“Can I put a picture from the gym in there?” Mr. de Blasio asked. (He added that he was “not a believer” in online dating.)

As the conversation neared its end, the former mayor pulled out his phone to play a song called “Mango,” saying it might best explain their feelings now.

“I don’t want nothing but you,” it went. “Getting what you need / Even if it ain’t from me.”

Mr. de Blasio hummed a bit from his chair. Ms. McCray danced behind him, gazing ahead.

“Isn’t that beautiful?” he said.

Former New York City mayor Bill de Blasio is excited for his new life

Incredible move here from these two. What a concept. They're essentially done with faking the whole marriage thing and just wanna start dating other people without actually getting divorced or dealing with all that paperwork.

Hard not to respect that.

“I just want to have fun,” McCray said.

McCray, by the way, was also A LESBIAN when the two met back in the early 1990s. What a twist!

The couple also claimed that this tough decision came during a heart-to-heart last spring in which they discussed why they were not “lovey-dovey" anymore.

Translation: not a lot action going on in the de Blasio household. Probably hasn't been for a while, either.

Bill, any thoughts on that?

"For the guy who took the chance on a woman who was an out lesbian and wrote an article called ‘I Am a Lesbian’ … there was a part of me that would at times say, ‘Hmmm, is this like a time bomb ticking? Is this something that you’re going to regret later on?’” he admitted.

Classic Monday Morning Quarterbacking there from the former NYC mayor. Hindsight is always 20/20.

Anyway, the two said they have no plans to divorce or for either to move out of their Park Slope home.

They're essentially going from married couple to college roommates. I'd also venture to guess that McCray may give the whole lesbian thing a shot again.

Just a hunch.

A few weeks after their impromptu session amid that Saturday night of television, they exchanged written messages outlining 'what we felt about the moment,' Mr. de Blasio said. After that, he said, ground rules were established: “what’s cool, and what’s not cool, and whatever else.”

"And whatever else."

What a life.