Bill Belichick & Girlfriend Jordon Isabella Reportedly Talking Marriage Is Nuts

Bill Belichick just can't stop chasing rings. 

The 72-year-old retired (for now) coaching legend who went out and got himself a 23-year-old Ferrari girlfriend named Jordon Isabella as his retirement gift, is now reportedly talking marriage, according to a wild new Daily Mail report. 

Yes, marriage. Reportedly. Allegedly. 

Yes, to a woman old enough to be his granddaughter. 

"Bill is in a bit of a crossroads on what he would like to do for his future as there is still a drive to coach again and break the wins record, but his life now isn't that bad as he has been enjoying doing TV and absolutely enjoying his relationship with his girlfriend Jordon that is blossoming into something that is going to lead to marriage," a source told the Mail. 

According to OutKick's Armando Salguero, Bill and Isabella won't be building a marital (allegedly; reportedly) life in New Jersey with Hoodie coaching the New York Jets. That possibility was put to rest Monday night during the Bills-Jets game when Bill took a swipe at Jets owner Woody Johnson.

All signs point to Bill becoming the head coach of the Dallas Cowboys, if he wants the job. 

If it happens, Belichick, who turns 73 in April, would become the NFL's oldest head coach during the 2025 season. Romeo Crennel currently holds the record. Bruce Arians holds the current record for oldest coach to win the Super Bowl. He was 68 when his Tom Brady-led Buccaneers team won the COVID Super Bowl LV in 2021. 

What in the hell is Bill Belichick thinking talking marriage to Jordon Isabella?

Bill, it's perfectly fine to have some 23-year-old former competitive cheerleader/beauty queen to serve as your social media intern and on your arm as you live it up in retirement. 

Weird? Yes. 

Odd? Of course. 

Marriage, though? Absolutely absurd! 

You lease the girlfriends at this age, Bill. The minute you go the Hugh Hefner route, she's going to trash your ass when you're dead and gone. Crystal Hefner danced on Hef's grave once he was six-feet under. Let's go back to earlier this year when Crystal ran to the tabloids to say sex with Hef was "robotic" and that it was a "well-oiled and well-practiced sequence of events ...that went the same exact way every time."

Hef gave her that last name and this is how she treats that man's legacy. 

Jordon might be the sweetest 23-year-old former competitive cheerleader ever, but this is the path that Bill could be taking and if you're chasing rings at 72, you are signaling you care about your legacy. 

I've seen it too many times, Bill. I've fought against Crystal Hefner when she bashed sleeping with 80-year-old Hef.

This poor guy had girlfriends ripping his "hoarder-style bedroom" and revealing Hugh had "vibrators all over the bed."

Look, I get that men stay horny forever and sex is undefeated. JUST DATE THEM, BILL. 

There are too many guys out there who put a ring on it and the next thing they know she has half of the 401k, the house, the zero-turn mower, custody of the dogs, the Nantucket beach house, the cars, the country club membership and the guy is left visiting the dogs on Wednesdays and every other weekend. 

Don't do it, Bill. Stop letting your dong do the talking.