Player Requests Fifth Star, Loves Porn
Getting a fifth star is incredibly competitive. You have to put up big stats, have all the measurables, flaunt your offers, do whatever it takes to get that fifth star.
Including, sometimes, emailing or Tweeting the rating services themselves and personally making your case for that fifth star.
Which brings us to 6'5" 295 pound defensive tackle Elisha Shaw. Both Rivals and 247 Sports have him ranked as a four star, just on the outskirts of receiving his fifth star. Rivals has him as the 39th best player in the 2014 class, with offers from Alabama, Florida State, Texas, and Georgia, among others.
247 Sports has him as the 42nd best player in the country.
So he's really close to that tantalizing fifth star on both major recruiting services.
So Shaw and his representatives are lobbying the rating services for that fifth star.
How so?
By Tweeting a screen shot of his ranking and arguing for more respect.
We were just emailed this, but Shaw tweeted this pic a while back and it's still up on his Twitter handle. "Man, I need that fifth star."
Now, talk to recruiting services and their employees and this type of lobbying isn't uncommon. Players and their representatives get fired up about the ratings just like fans. There are quite a few four stars. But if you're one of a handful of five stars? Well, that's a lot more impressive than just being one of the top four stars in the country.
So the players and their representatives lobby hard for that fifth star.
But when most players Tweet a screen shot of their rankings pleading for a fifth star, they usually don't have other windows open behind those rankings.
Elisha Shaw did.
And it appears he was multitasking.
Specifically, he really likes point of view porn starring Isis Taylor.
If you aren't familiar with Isis Taylor's work, according to Wikipedia she's a 23 year old five-tool porn star of Peruvian, Scottish, and Israeli descent.
Right now, she appears to favor USC.
But I think Shaw could make a run at her if he only had that fifth star to flash around.
Since Shaw seems to like POV porn, assuming he wants to stay in the SEC, OKTC would suggest Texas or Mississippi as the best porn fits, since both rank POV quite highly in their most popular porn searches list.
Also, anyone else wondering what page he was trying to open that he couldn't?
In the meantime, let this be a lesson to all your four stars out there seeking a fifth star, beware the open sites on your phone when you screenshot the rankings to make your case.
Although, to be fair to Shaw, I'd probably be more inclined to give him a fifth star after this move than I was before.